Understanding
by Jrn77
Summary: First attempt at writing one of these,but goes off of scenes surrounding the hotel scene of 9x10 with Calzona.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Based off of 9x10. Pieces that might have been left out of the hotel room scene.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: This could lead to more chapters. Give me some feedback!

Understanding

Both Callie and Arizona sat up in bed watching the movie being shown on the big screen in the hotel room. While Callie was content simply being on the same piece of furniture as her wife, Arizona couldn't focus. She kept moving her hand up and down Callie's thigh out of nervousness. She kept replaying the entire day over and over again in her mind. This was not how this night was supposed to go. She couldn't help but wonder how Callie could be so patient with her. After finally giving up on attempting to understand anything going on within the movie being shown, she decided to ask Callie herself.

"Uh..Callie..?" Arizona quietly said. "Huh?" Callie responded, which meant she was semi listening and at the same time distracted by the movie.

"I just wanted to say thank you." Callie finally turned and looked into her wife's big blue eyes. They were the same blue eyes that kissed her in the dirty bar bathroom years ago, the same eyes that asked her to marry her, and the same eyes she looked into on the day of her wedding.

After realizing she had just been blatantly staring at Arizona remembering all that they have been through, Callie finally laughed and responded by saying "Thank me for what exactly? You were the one who was thoughtful enough to get us this hotel room while other the other guests are stuck downstairs."

Arizona put her hand on top of Callie's and squeezed it tight. She closed her eyes and let out a deep breathe, "No,Callie. For being here for me. For never leaving even when I was such a monster to you. For always being my wife."

Callie squeezed Arizona's hand even tighter and kissed the side of her face. After pulling away from the sweet and delicate kiss she realized that her wife had begun to cry.

"Hey,hey why are you crying? Of course I am never going to leave Arizona. I love you. More than anything or anyone and nothing could ever change that." Callie cupped Arizona's face with her hands and smiled. A smile that Arizona returned as she tried to stop the tears from continuing to fall.

"I guess I just never realized how lucky I am to have you Callie. I think I just abused our marriage because deep down I knew that you were the only person who would never leave. But at the same time, I wouldn't blame you for leaving. After all.."

Callie pulls her wife in for another kiss, this time face to face, not allowing Arizona to finish a statement Callie would refuse to hear.

"Arizona,I will never ever leave. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I took that oath and I will keep it until the day I die. I will never stop fighting to get your trust back. And I will never stop loving you."

Once again the tears begin to fall from Arizona's blue eyes. But she somehow manages to look Callie directly in the eyes. Those brown eyes that gave her butterflies. That still give her butterflies.

"I wanted this night to be special. I wanted us to finally be us again. I want everything we once had and more." Callie's grin turns into the biggest smile Arizona has seen.

"Well,I could not agree anymore. Arizona I will wait as long as it takes."

Arizona pulls Callie in closer and runs her hands through her hair. "Well,I do have an idea..."

To Be Continued...


	2. Chapter 2

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Based off of 9x08 I believe... from the kitchen scene, Arizona's first day back at work.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: I'm kinda going out of order,eventually the chapters will all piece together. Enjoy!

Learning

"A modification of a behavioral tendency by experience."

That is what we define the word "learning" to be. For Arizona, it only took the first date for her to learn every aspect that made Callie the person she loves unconditionally. Arizona can just take one quick look at her wife and know every thought that is racing through her complex mind.

Arizona put Sofia down and glanced over to see Callie still staring in awe as she continues to finish the dinner she started preparing before getting distracted by the dance party her daughter wanted to have.

"So...what's on your mind Callie?" Arizona asks sweetly with a smile. A simple smile that barely shows off her amazing dimples that have been in hiding ever since the horrible accident. Callie continues to stare at her wife, unsure of how to respond.

She thinks to herself. What's on my mind? This is the first time you've held our daughter. The first time you let me come near you without flinching in fear. The first time I can kiss you and see that you actually enjoy it. Callie shakes her head, getting rid of all those thoughts floating through her mind.

"Nothing,I'm just happy to see you playing with Sofia." She pauses,contemplating to continue.

"She's missed you. Well...we both have missed you to be honest. The house has been extremely quiet. It's been missing things..."

Callie's happy tone fades off and her smile fades into a frown. A frown that shows the ever so visible lines of stress that have formed from the past five months of pain. Arizona wheels herself towards Callie and puts her hand out. Callie turns and grabs her hand,the hand of her wife that she loves so dearly.

"Callie,you can tell me what's wrong. Keep going. Please." Arizona almost snaps the words out but recovers by smiling and holding onto her wife's hand tighter.

"Your laugh." Callie blurts out.

Arizona gives a puzzled look towards Callie, lifting an eyebrow as a key to continue on with what she is saying.

"The house has been silent. Well it doesn't help that I've been sleeping at Mark's all the time. But your laugh, I haven't heard it since...yeah."

Arizona shakes her head and begins to realize how lucky she is to have Callie. While every other spouse would have ran away, looking for someone that isn't broken, Callie has stood by her. Arizona begins to tear up knowing that Callie not only misses the biggest aspects of their lives such as Mark, but even the simplest of things such as the laughter that used to echo throughout the walls of their apartment.

Callie quickly backs away, fearful that she has just caused what could be a catastrophic meltdown. Then she feels Arizona tightly grip her hands. Both of them.

Arizona looks up and decides that it is time. It is time to pull it together. To be strong. To talk. To be that good man in the storm she knows she is.

"I've missed hearing my own laughter..." She begins in a soft tone, causing Callie to whip her head to look at those sad blue eyes in front of her.

"I actually forget how to laugh for a while. Crazy right? I've been so angry and mad all the time that I have taken advantage of the simple things in life. But, today at work it reminded to enjoy the simple things. I saw all the kids smiling and laughing and I realized that I am so lucky. Do you know why Callie?"

Callie shakes her head. She thinks to herself,I hope its because of me and Sofia but she keeps her thoughts to herself, allowing her wife to continue.

"Because I'm alive. I'm not only alive, but I have a beautiful and healthy daughter that I get to come home to and play with. A daughter that is what I consider to be a miracle. One of the best things that has ever happened to me."

Callie smiles, grateful that Arizona is aware of the fact that she didn't break her promise in spite, but only to save her. Then, Arizona continues.

"Did you think I was finished?" she says with a bright smile. Callie turns her head to the side, unsure where she is going with this now.

"Callie. I have you. I might have lost parts of me. Parts that might not ever come back not only physically but mentally as well. But, I never lost you. You are more than half of me, because the love I have for you is something that can not be measure nor defined because it truly is never ending."

Callie stands in front of her wife. Her wife that was once just an empty shell. Scratch that. Not empty, but filled with rage,anger, and hate. But now, those pieces that were missing are coming back together.

"Arizona,I don't even know what to say." Callie's eyes continue to glance around their apartment as if she's looking for something to distract her from the pouncing sound and feeling of her heart after hearing those words come from Arizona's mouth.

"You don't need to say anything Callie,I don't expect you to. Especially after the way I've lashed out at you. But I can see you are in pain just as much as I am. I can see it in your eyes. Remember, I am the one who knows you better than anyone else..." Arizona finishes her statement with that last remark.

Callie can tell from the tone Arizona used that she was smiling as she spoke. Smiling out of pride knowing that it's true that Arizona does know Callie better than anyone else ever has.

"Arizona. I love you. That's all I can say right now. Because like we've said before,it really is the only thing that matters. I don't care what you say or do to me. We're in this together."

Arizona pulls herself out of her wheelchair, leaning up against the same counter her wife stands at. Without even thinking she pulls Callie into a kiss. A simple kiss, but one that lasts for more than a brief moment. A kiss that causes Arizona to rely on Callie for support because she still cannot stand for very long without support. But Callie is there to hold her up.

After their lips part Arizona looks at the clock.

"As much as I would love to stand in the kitchen and chat like this, my leg doesn't exactly allow to sit still for long."

Callie looks down at the missing shadow of a leg before shaking her head and standing straight up off of the counter, still having a somewhat death grip on Arizona's hips.

"Yes, of course. I'm sorry to keep you standing,I wanted to lean down and kiss you but I wasn't sure if it was too much for you," Callie states quickly as she nervously puts her hands on her own two thighs.

"Don't apologize, and don't be afraid, I won't bite. But, american bake-off is on again in a few minutes...would you watch with me?" Arizona asks her wife with a cute grin, a face that Callie could never say no to.

"Of course...but under one condition," Callie says.

Arizona smiles, "name it."

"I get to hold you. Not with my eyes from across the room. Actually hold you. Like I used to."

Arizona stares at Callie for a brief moment before grabbing her hand and leading them both to the couch.

This chapter will have a second part,I promise!


	3. Chapter 3

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Continuing the from the previous scene from the kitchen of the episode I can't remember for the life of me.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Finally starting to get back in order episode wise,still a work in progress.

Progress

For Callie it seemed like it was only days ago when her and Arizona were in this living room at this exact spot for the first time.

Callie can remember their first date perfectly as her and Arizona danced around this exact room. The feeling of having her hands lay on Arizona's small but bony hips as she threw her hands in the air and danced around Callie. The sight of her bright white smile seeming to only get larger. Her blonde curly locks bouncing around in every direction.

Before Callie could bring a smile to her face, that memory was gone. It dissolved as quickly as dark images of the plane that carried her once super magic wife hit the ground, forever taking traits that made her the person she once had been began clouding within her mind. But now, they were back in the room were the so called magic had all begun.

But this time it was different. They weren't the bubbly eager energetic people they once were. They were damaged. But, were was the key word in that statement. Now,they were building. Building their relationship that was so fun loving that it made every couple in their workplace jealous, wondering how two people could be so hypnotized by one another. But now, it was time to rebuild all of the things they lost.

After Callie allowed Arizona to take her hand and lead her to the couch for their new ritual of american bake-off, they both find themselves unsure of where to proceed next. It had been months since the two had resumed the cuddling couch position that they had once mastered.

"How close do I sit..Where should I put my hands...Dare I touch for her...I can't stare..I need to focus..You can do this." Both women have these thoughts running through their minds,as if they are about to sit down next to a complete stranger.

After helping her wife stand and grab her crutches, Callie took the lead, taking her usual seat on her side of the couch. This forced Arizona to make her move. Arizona first sits a distance away from Callie, almost afraid to touch her wife. Then, the shiny ring that sat on her left hand reminded her that the physical contact from her wife was not something to fear. She was her wife. She remembered all her kind words. All that she has and had done for her. She scooted closer, and closer to Callie before finally speaking softly.

"Is this too close...am I bothering you...I know we haven't sat near each other in quite some time now..." her voice quietly disappears under her breathe just as Callie turns and gives her wife direct eye contact.

"This is fine," she says with a smile before continuing on."But this is even better."

Before Arizona is even able to react, Callie has pulled her completely over to her side as she wraps her arms around Arizona's body, gripping one of Arizona's hands and slowly rubbing her other hand across the top of her wife's temple.

Arizona seems to be shock at first,not sure if she's ready for this type of physical contact. But it only takes seconds for her to relax into her wife's embrace. An embrace that feels safe. An embrace that was one thing she needed during those cold nights in the woods. An embrace that is filled with pure love. An embrace that finally makes her feel at home.

"Callie..." Arizona begins to say before her eyes seem to become filled with tears.

Callie alarmed by the tone of Arizona's voice quickly becomes worried and tries to pull herself away from the embrace. But Arizona won't let her. She grips onto Callie's shirt with one hand and grasps her other hand tighter.

"Is this too much too fast,I'm sorry I didn't mean to," Callie is quick to say before realizing that her wife is refusing to let her go.

"No,no Callie stop. Don't move. Please. This...this is the first time that..just."

Arizona is unable to finish her words as a mindset of frustration thoughts over takes her ability to speak. Callie continues to let Arizona grasp onto her,still unsure of exactly what she can do to comfort her wife.

"Arizona,what do you need me to do? I'll do anything for you,you know that."

After her tears prolong long enough and her chest becomes less heavy, Arizona is able to lift her face off from the position of being buried within Callie's chest, she begins to speak.

"Stay with me. Don't leave my side. I've sat alone in our bedroom,which I know is all of my fault because I wouldn't let you near me,but I need you now. More than ever. Because I can't go another day without kissing you, receiving one of your hugs, and holding onto your hands. But I can't go to fast. Because everything is so overwhelming to me,I just..can't."

Shocked at the words spewing from her exhausted yet still amazingly beautiful wife, Callie does what she does best; she comforts her.

"Arizona,I will stay on this couch for days with you. I will hold your hand and never let go of it if it will help to make you feel better. I know I can't fix the things that have happened, but I do know that we have so many great things to look forward to in our future. A future that is you,me, and Sofia. Okay? No one is going anywhere. And I am never going anywhere without you by my side."

For a while, Callie's words only brought a burning feeling to Arizona's eyes and heart. But now, they bring back hope. She believes in her wife. She listens to her words and know they are coming from her never ending supply of love.

"Thank you,Callie." She says with a smile as she turns her attention towards the show that they have already missed 20 minutes of from their heart to heart conversation.

Callie nods her head and kisses the top of Arizona's head, a simple gesture that is signal for Arizona to lean back into her wife and make herself comfy.

Not long after their talk,the only noises to be heard from apartment 502 is the television, the soft breathing of Arizona, and the sound of hands being brushed through her wavy yet curly blonde hair.

Callie still awake,realized that her wife had fallen asleep like usual. She kissed the back of her head, trying to decide what to do next. Then, it hit her.

Arizona began to wake up as she realized she no longer heard the sound of the television and instead heard a large grunt coming from her wife who no long was sitting beside her.

"Cal...Callie..what in the world are you doing?!"

But before Arizona could do anything, Callie had already carried her all the way to their bedroom, where she gently placed her wife on her designated side of the bed.

"I'm putting you to bed,what does it look like I'm doing." Callie says with a giggle.

She then proceeds to kiss the side of Arizona's face and turn the light off.

"Goodnight Arizona,I love you."

But before she can turn away,Arizona grabs her hand and pulls her onto the bed.

"Stay Callie."

It wasn't a Calliope. It wasn't an I love you. But,it was a start. It was progress.


	4. Chapter 4

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: The morning/day surrounding the events before Bailey's wedding

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Any ideas what you want to read next?

Appreciate

As human beings, we have the tendency to take the smallest and yet simplest things that we encounter in our everyday lives for granted. Whether its a complete stranger holding a door open for us, or even a person paying for your coffee as they stand in front of you in the never ending line. But,the second something is ripped from our lives, we need it back. We don't take the time to love what we have but we have the time to grieve over what is lost.

For Callie and Arizona, almost everything was lost. The foundation of their heart warming loving marriage was practically demolished. But,they never lost sight of the little things that made their relationship unique from all of the rest. It was the simple baby steps of progress they were making that managed to get the both of them through what seems like a never ending journey towards closure.

It was around 6:30am when Arizona was awoken from the small beams of sunlight shining into their bedroom. As she tried to roll over and shield her eyes from daylight, she realized that her blankets had suddenly became tangled within her body parts,almost engulfing her into her own bed. Then, she realized those weren't sheets. It was her wife.

Her wife who had been sleeping on the couch, at work, and even her dead best friends bed. After months of watching Callie stand at their bedroom door frame,Arizona finally decided to let her back into their bed. Arizona could see in Callie's big brown eyes the disparity they carried. The desperate want for Callie to just lay down next to Arizona and hold her. Hold her and never let go.

"Callie..." Arizona said quietly,realizing then in that moment how truly peaceful her wife looked as she laid next to her asleep. Regretting her decision to try and wake her wife who had practically overtaken her side of the bed, Arizona instead snuggled her head into Callie's neck.

"Ari..." Callie began to speak,but Arizona began to kiss her neck, not letting Callie finish.

Callie smiled as she began to breathe in the scent of her wife. A scent that missed so much. She kissed the top of her head, and pulled her closer into her arms.

"You know,you are the biggest bed hog I have ever met." Arizona stated in a playful voice.

"Sorry,I'll move over. I didn't mean to take up your space..." Callie says,clearly not understanding the sarcasm in her wife's remark.

"Callie...I was kidding. I don't mind. It's kinda been cold in here without you to be honest."

Arizona grabs onto the hand that Callie has stretched across her side. She then continues to speak.

"But if you can,could you loosen your grip on my shirt. I think you might rip it off if you pull any tighter."

Callie immediately lets go of the fabric and puts her hand on top of her own head. Arizona notices the devastated facial expression that has now taken over Callie's once glowing face.

"Cal...whats the matter?" Arizona says quickly as she pulls both of her hands to keep Callie's head from falling onto the bed. She watches as Callie takes in a deep breathe,fearful of the words she is about to release.

"Those nights you were missing,I sat in our bed. I just sat here holding your pillow because it was the closest thing to you. I held it and never let go,because I was afraid that if I did,that you really were gone."

Arizona overwhelmed by the sadness that has just been released from her ever so beautiful wife's face begins to kiss the top of head as she feels Callie's tears trickle down her face and onto the sheets.

"Its okay, its okay. I'm here now. You don't have to let go because I am always coming back okay? You can hold my hand all day and lay with me or whatever makes you remember that I am here now."

They continued to lay in their bed,enjoying one another's company. A moment they had been working towards for months now. But they both had surgeries,and eventually a wedding to go to.

Fast forward. Hours later.

After Callie decides to explain her harsh yet honest feelings about Arizona's missing limb,they now face the car ride to the wedding that neither are quite excited to be attending. Especially,the ever so enthused Arizona.

After sitting in silence for most of the ride there,Callie decides to break the ice. After awkwardly gripping the steering wheel and constantly glancing over to Arizona for what seems like hours,she finally beings to speak.

"Doesn't it seem like this was just us."

Arizona finally turns her head from gaze outside the window to face Callie, pulling her eyes down to form an almost evil facial expression. A facial expression that could burn holes through anyone or anything in her path.

"What do you mean just like us. Because from what I remember,I don't think we ever sat in a car without talking or singing. Well,mainly me talking and you staring like usual."

Callie could immediately sense the irritation within Arizona's tone. Once again,the anger was unleashed.

"No...I wasn't talking about the car ride. I was talking about getting married..our wedding day..."

Arizona immediately pulled the angered look off of her face. How could I be such a monster? How could I miss all the happiness in this day?

"Oh...right." Arizona says with a small sad smile.

"It seems like it was literally yesterday that Mark was walking me down the aisle and all I kept thinking was that I was going to trip and fall in front of everyone. But,then. I saw you."

Arizona's small sad smile slowly turned into a larger one as she thought of that exact moment. In a spur of the moment choice,she found herself suddenly gripping onto Callie's hand that was on the center dash.

"I saw you and I knew I wouldn't fall because I needed to make it to the end. To make it there to tell you how much I love you and how I never want to spend another day without calling you my wife.

Arizona was still in the process of forgiving. Still in the process of getting her groove back. She was still learning how to use her words again. But,she could still use her actions to show that she wasn't as cold inside as Callie thought she was.

As the light in front of them turned red,Arizona moved from her seat and kissed the side of Callie's face. A gesture that caused Callie's entire face to turn bright red,as red as the street light hanging in front of them.

"I remember that day too," Arizona began.

"I saw you walking in front of me and for once in my life, I felt complete."

It wasn't a heartfelt I love you and I can't live without you and our ten kids. It wasn't as noble of a speech as Callie had given. But,it was words.

Callie grinned and continued to look forward,focused on the road.

Arizona returned her hand to the center dash,pulling Callie's free hand with her. The rest of the ride there they sat in silence. But,Arizona smiled the entire way as she rubbed her fingers over the ring that was positioned on her wife's hand. A ring that meant commitment. Through good,bad,happy,and sad. It meant forever.


	5. Chapter 5

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: The day has come. Time for Calzona to get their groove on.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: What else would you like to read about?

Trying

It was a three letter word. An action that they mastered within the first time they experienced it together. It was something that was apart of their everyday lives. Something they just couldn't get enough of. While it could be defined as an object of lust for other relationships, for them it was pure love. But,now the tables have turned. They are inching closer and closer to the next step.

This task is one that involves trust from both ends.

One being that Callie won't run,even if this does take some more time.

Second being Arizona putting fourth the effort to let Callie behind the walls she has built.

What is this task,this three letter word,this prize at the end of the never ending road?

Sex.

After the failed attempt in the hotel room, both Arizona and Callie really became focused on rebuilding the structure surrounding their love life. The foundations of the marriage that almost everyone that encountered them idolized started by the pure admiration these two had towards each other.

An observer couldn't help but smile if they were to see them walking down the halls of the hospital together, always hand in hand. Callie always carried a confident but grateful look upon face. Arizona on the other hand just smiled so large that her dimples were practically popping out of her face Their love was truly something that could not be duplicated.

They couldn't even stand going hours without seeing each other. Whether it was two minutes or one hour, they cherished every second they got to spend together. There was never enough time to spend together.

Fast forward to the plane crash. Now,they had plenty of time. Time that remained still as Callie stood at their bedroom door watching her wife deal with internal and external pain. Callie was given a few weeks off after Arizona was sent home to recover from her surgery and time for the death of Mark. But,this was not how she expected her time to spend. Standing from a doorway with her own wife acting like a stranger. It was like a stranger was living in their home. Their home.

Now time has passed. The anger has been put aside. It was time to move forward to rediscover the next level that lead to the creation of their marriage. Affection.

Callie couldn't help but want Arizona near her at all times. From their first kiss they shared as Callie pulled Arizona near her on the stairs, to their passionate makeout sessions in on call rooms to cure headaches, it all revolved around the passion and affection they felt towards each other.

It has now taken months. Months of sleeping in separate places. Months of "I love you" and getting nothing but pugnacious looks in return. But,now they were finally making progress.

Arizona was having a good day. The sun was shining in her eyes as walked proudly around her peds ward that she called her second home. She had successful surgeries back to back all day and was eager to rush home to her wife. Her wife who would be incredibly proud of her and wear the same huge smile if she had completed ten surgeries or even one.

That was one thing Arizona greatly missed. Her talks with Callie. They always told each other about how their days went while eating dinner which usually ended up with a passionate night of sex and lying in one another's arms. They not only had an amazing physical attraction towards each other but they truly did love hearing every aspect of one another's work day.

After making her way home, Arizona opened the door to their apartment and found her two girls playing on the ground with some toys. Immediately, a huge smile appeared on her face as she saw Callie holding Sofia in her lap.

"Oh hey,welcome home," Callie says with a grin and she lifts Sofia up in the air.

"Hi and hello to you Sofia,are you having fun with your mom?"

Callie stands up and hands Sofia to Arizona who's smile only continues to grow larger. Immediately after falling into Arizona's arms,Sofia rests her head on her shoulder and begins to rub her eyes.

"Well someone seems to have had a long day of playing," Arizona says with a laugh as she rubs Sofia's back.

"Yeah we had a lot of fun going room to room playing with every toy in sight."

"Well, why don't I go put this very tired girl to bed."

"Sounds good. Oh wait,Arizona what do you want for dinner? I was thinking I could order something and you can tell me all about your day."

Arizona turns around as she approaches Sofia's room and shoots Callie a cute yet seductive look.

"Hmm...Pizza. I always love eating it in bed. With you. And talking. With you."

Callie's mouth dropped open. She thought to herself,is she hinting towards what I think?

Pizza had always been their thing. From their first time, to the time Callie told Mark to hit the road so they could have sex, it always involved pizza.

Callie shuts her mouth and smiles.

"Of course we can get pizza." Callie then calmly walks from the living room to find the menus. She suddenly finds herself incredibly nervous. She shakes her head, hoping the nerves will go away.

Arizona reappears after fighting to put Sofia down to sleep for the night.

"So,did you order?" she says with a bright smile as she approaches the kitchen bar where Callie is standing.

Callie,apparently stuck in a trance, completely ignores her wife. She finds herself too busy looking at every aspect of her wife.

"Callie...hello there.." Arizona says with a puzzled look.

"Oh yeah,sorry I was just kinda spacing out. Yeah I ordered your favorite. It should be here in about ten."

Arizona smiled and laughed knowing that Callie was still visually in a trance, taking in every part of her body through those big brown eyes.

"Do you want to tell me about your surgery or would you rather wait until the pizza is here and we sit down and eat?"

Arizona tilted her head to the side for a second. She began the thought process of how to tell Callie that she wanted to try tonight, to make tonight their night without coming off to forceful.

"Well,if its okay with you I was kinda thinking we could eat in the bedroom. You know, like we used to. Just sit and talk and stuff.." Arizona's voice slowly faded as she tilted her head the other way, giving Callie the look.

This was the look. The look Callie craved. The look she couldn't resist. The look that could brighten any moment.

Callie's eyes continued to get wider. She just stared.

"Oh my god...yes. Um,yes. Arizona yes. I wanted to ask you but I didn't want to push."

Arizona just nodded and smiled. Over the past few weeks, Arizona really took notice on how truly patient her wife was. She not only was an amazing caretaker but she truly was willing to wait for Arizona. Even if it meant 5 months of living hell.

Before Callie knew it,Arizona had grabbed her hand and they were slowly making it down the hallway leading to the bedroom. Their bedroom.

The spent more time rubbing their bodies against each other as they kissed and fell backwards into the walls. Callie thought to herself, if it wasn't for the walls the both of them would be rolling around the ground and would probably never make it to the bed.

After a long string of kissing and some walking, they finally made to the bedroom. There were no nerves this time. There were no cold feet. No questions. Just love.

Callie spun them around and pushed them back onto the bed so she was on top of Arizona. They continued their passionate kissing.

Callie was the first to break the kiss that seemed to be going on for hours.

"Arizona,before we do this. I want to tell you something."

Arizona pulled her hands out of Callie's hair and pulled them to the sides of her face and nodded, which was signature for her wanting Callie to continue so they could get back to business.

"I want to say that I love you. Everything about you. And I always will. No matter what. I know I say that I love you all the time,but I really want you to know that I mean it."

Arizona's eyes got wider as she focused on the brown eyes looking directly at her. They were filled with so much pain but at the same time she could see in Callie's eyes how much she truly did love her. How much she meant it.

Arizona smiled and pressed her thumb gently across Callie's face.

"I know you. Now,you better rip both of our clothes off and prove it. We don't have much time until the pizza guy gets here..."

Not even allowing Arizona to finish her statement, Callie had already closed the distance between them. Their lips smashing together as she began ripping her clothes off and throwing them across the room.

As things continued to heat up, Arizona realized she was no longer ashamed of her stump. She embraced it. She had finally dealt with the reality that her leg was gone and it was time to deal with what she had. Plus, with her amazingly beautiful wife's hands roaming all over her body, she had no time to think about anything.

Hands continued to roam and legs were soon flopping in every which direction. As usual,Callie was the one to take control. But, Arizona did not mind at all. She was so gentle and yet incredibly sexy at the same time.

Before they knew it, they had both reached their high. Coming back down from the moment they had been wanting to share with each other for months, they had nothing but smiles on their faces.

Callie was still on top of Arizona, she stayed like that for a few minutes just staring at her wife as those both linked hands together. Even with sweat coming down her face and hair tangled in every direction, she still found her perfect.

Arizona pulled her hands up Callie's back, sending chill through her spine. She still had the magic touch. The touch that made Callie flinch at any second.

"Callie." Arizona said in a sweet but ever so serious tone. Callie,still trying to catch her breath was only able to arch her eyebrows as she rested her head against her wife's.

Suddenly, they heard a noise. Arizona tilted her head, looking at Callie wondering if they were expecting someone. They then realized that they both had forgotten about the dinner they had ordered.

Callie suddenly rolled off of her wife and grabbed her robe.

"Don't you move,or put any clothes back on. I'll be back before you know it." Callie said with a smile.

"Well good thing we left the door open otherwise we never would have gotten the pizza." She said with a wicked grin on her face.

Arizona sat up on the bed covering herself with the sheets that were half torn off of the bed,grabbing Callie's hand before she could go answer the door. Callie stopped and looked back at her wife leaning slightly downward on the bed.

"What,whats wrong?" She asked quickly as she took Arizona's other hand.

"I love you you too. And I always will."


	6. Chapter 6

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Based on the events of 9x16

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Not really pleased with the way the episodes are going because it is making it hard to write about

Deja Vu

After a day that seemed to be never ending, the clock had finally click to past ten meaning Callie and Arizona could venture home through the pouring Seattle rain to relieve the babysitter. Yes,the babysitter Callie never could remember the name of.

Arizona made it to the lobby first, standing with her bag in her hands waiting for her wife. She began to get irritated and fidgety. Although her prosthetic gave her plenty of support, she still found herself restless went having to stand still for long periods of time for no reason.

Just as she was about to pull her sleeve up to look at her watch, Callie came flying around the corner. A smile automatically was brought to her face as she saw her wife, almost knocking.

"I know I'm running late. Sorry,sorry, and did I mention I'm sorry?" Callie began to say nervously as she searched for the car keys.

"Callie, its fine. Don't worry about it. I can't exactly leave without my wife you know." Arizona states in a playful tone to assure Callie she isn't going to rip her head off on the spot.

Callie feeling relieved is finally able to locate the keys and shoots her wife a smile before swinging her bag onto arm and opening the umbrella as they walk out the sliding doors.

Callie, as always, grabs onto Arizona's hand as they walk to find their car. Arizona grips Callie's hand even harder. Not only because she has missed the months of feeling close to her wife, but also because she knows that Callie won't let her slip and fall.

"Dang, you think this rain would have let up by now." Callie says with a frustrated tone. Arizona can't help but laugh as how the little things irritate Callie so quickly.

Arizona doesn't realize that the entire walk to their car Callie had been standing on the outside rim of the umbrella to ensure that Arizona was completely covered from the down poor of the rain. She then realized Callie was soaking wet.

"Callie...how are you holding my hand yet you are nowhere near the umbrella at the same time..."

Callie stopped walking and then realized herself that she had somehow wandered out of the shield of the umbrella.

"I,I honestly have no idea. I think I just wanted to keep you dry I guess? I don't really know. I guess it's like a protective thing. Or something like that."

Arizona smiled and pulled the umbrella aside so they both were being drenched by the rain. She then pulled her hands up to the sides of Callie's face and shook her head.

"You know,you are awesome," she said as Callie just stood and smiled back.

Callie then opened the passenger door and helped Arizona climb in. She had gained a lot of strength back through her physical therapy but still had trouble having to hop up and still maintain balance.

The entire way home they held hands. Once again, Arizona death gripping Callie's hand as lightning began to strike brightly in front of them.

After relieving the babysitter, Callie and Arizona retired to their bedroom for the night.

They sat in silence for a while,staring up at the ceiling. Buying the hospital. They were actually going to buy the hospital. Scratch that. They only were they trying to buy the hospital but they quit their jobs.

Callie kept replaying the images of in her head of Arizona saying she was finally in on the plan. For a while, it seemed like they were battling each other. They were supposed to be a team. One.

Arizona eventually found a way to fall asleep regardless of the loud crashes of lightning shaking the walls surrounding them.

Callie on the other hand had switched positions from staring at the ceiling to now going back to her previous habit of staring at her wife as she laid peacefully next to her. Callie had her arm across Arizona's stomach, smoothly tracing patterns.

Without even having to open her eyes, Arizona knew Callie was pondering something.

"Alright, what's the matter. What are you thinking about." Arizona said in a mumbling sleepy voice.

Callie dropped her head into pillow, confused as to how Arizona could read her so well without even being completely coherent.

"How do you do that...it's so creepy.." Callie responding quietly.

Arizona chuckled, turning and opening her eyes finding Callie's eyes right across from her.

"No,what is creepy is you staring at me while I am trying to sleep and waking up to see that you are indeed staring at me."

Callie tries not to laugh but quickly hides the laughs with a smile.

"And, I know that you are staring because I can feel it. Kinda like when you hurt, I hurt. When you are sad, I suddenly feel sad. We're married. You love me. And I love you. Were connected."

Astonished by the words that had just come from her wife's mouth, Callie continues to stare. She then grabs into Arizona's hand and kisses her knuckles.

"So does that mean our wedding rings have super powers or something like that," Callie says with a huge grin that causes her sleepy wife to laugh.

"Yes,sure. Whatever makes you happy. Now,tell me what's going on in that head of yours so I can go back to sleep and you can actually stare at nothing but the inside of your own eyes."

"I don't know, I guess just so much went on today. I never thought you were going to go with this. You seemed to be so against it after you practically got us kicked out of Mer's place. I was just happy to see that you were all in if that makes sense."

Arizona continues to look directly into Callie's eyes. She never really realized how much it meant for her to be on Callie's side. But now, Arizona was the only side she had since Mark was no longer here. Arizona was Callie's other half.

"Well,I wasn't at first. And I really wanted to punch all of you in the face the last few days. But, I controlled myself and I really thought about things. Like the fact that if it wasn't for this hospital I would have nothing. I wouldn't have had all the friends I made. I wouldn't have an amazing intern to teach even though half the time I want to ship him off to a different state. Most importantly, I wouldn't have a daughter. A baby. Our baby. From you. Callie, the hospital gave me you. That's the best thing that has ever happened to me. Why would I want any of those things to change..."

Before Arizona could finish, Callie had already began to kiss her. Arizona pulled away first, soon resting her head against Callie's.

"You're right. The hospital is like our second home. I love working there. I love working with you. I not only get to spend time with you there but also here," Callie adds before moving her head back onto her pillow so Arizona can snuggle into her neck.

"Good. Then we will fight for what is ours. They can't take our home from us. But now, I need to sleep before I fall asleep during work tomorrow. You need to as well so you are not breaking extra bones including your own."

Callie smiles and pulls Arizona closer to her side. She kisses the top of her head and wraps her arms tightly around her so she knows that she is not leaving her side, no matter what. Hospital or no hospital at all, they were a team. Through good, bad, happy, and sad.


	7. Chapter 7

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Based on the events of 9x17 I think?

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: No new episodes for the next two weeks...we all will be reading a lot of fanfiction

Change

"Don't change for you,don't change a thing,for me."

Callie could still remember the first time Arizona entered into her apartment. Their apartment.

They danced together as the stars outside shined enough light through the windows that Callie couldn't help but fall for the women dancing near her. Blonde curls bouncing in every direction. A wicked smile that was contagious to any innocent bystander who encountered her. It was true, pediatric's did have much but Arizona Robbins also had magic surging through her veins.

It was in this apartment that they rushed home from Alex and Izzie's wedding to have their night. The day that was began with frustration from Callie having no money left after being cut off. The desperation of Arizona wanting to know why their date had not gone as planned. The pure sweetness of Arizona telling Callie that money didn't matter, being around her was all she needed. After heartfelt glances that were exchanged multiple times during the church ceremony, Arizona and Callie finally had their night.

It was here in this apartment that they overcame every obstacle that was faced. Callie losing her ex-husband. Losing patients that left before it was there time. Not wanting kids. The aftermath of the shooting. Preparing for Africa. Arizona coming back from Africa,Callie shutting the door on her face. Being all in on the unplanned pregnancy. Forgiveness for the mistakes they both had made. Learning to cope with the accident and move onto a brighter future. Dealing with Callie's mother's denial of their marriage. Actually getting married. Arizona losing her rock,Nick. The plane crash. Losing Mark. Losing a leg. Losing their marriage. Losing each other.

But, it was this very place that built the infrastructure of a relationship that blossomed from the hospital. The hospital built the framework to the masterpiece but the apartment composed the interior.

This was their home. Where all of their memories were made. Could they just up and leave?

Arizona put Sofia down after she nodded off after eating her cereal on Callie's lap. Most of which seemed to have landed on the ground instead of in the toddler's mouth. She then closed the door, watching as her little girl slept like she had ran a marathon that day. She made her way to the bedroom, stopping at the door frame to watch her wife for a moment.

She could see the pain in her eyes. It was a pain that was only visible at the end of the day. The time when Callie could just sit in bed and let everything process in her mind.

"Callie, what's the matter?" Arizona says as she begins to pull the covers back and make her way to her wife's side of the bed.

Callie,unsure if she should spew out all the facts and memories running through her head tries to think of an excuse or subject change to inform her wife with.

"Uh...nothing I was just thinking about my patient...B..Barb..." Callie arches her eyebrows, shaking her head to try to convince Arizona of this nonexistent patient of hers.

Arizona,who is of course on top of everything, knows immediately what is wrong.

"Its the house thing isn't it? Its freaking you out because this has been your place for so long. And Mark's place."

Again, Callie sat in awe staring at Arizona wondering if she had some crazy mind powers where she could just x-ray and see straight into her mind.

Arizona turns to face Callie,smiling as she puts a hand on her shoulder.

"Callie you haven't been to the hospital in a week now and I don't recall there being a Barb in your patient list."

Even on their worst days, Arizona could still remember ever detail Callie would reveal as they conversed as they left for work or returned home from work.

Callie smiles at her wife,looking as her eyes seem to carry such and undying love in them. The eyes that were once so empty,now are returning to what they once were.

"Yeah, you got me. I don't know. This place just has so many memories. It's like the hospital. This is my home. This where I finally found myself. This is where our life began. Where our family began." Callie puts her head back down onto her pillow and shuts her eyes.

Arizona takes a moment just to look at her wife. She begins to glance around their room. She remember when she would come over to visit Callie and always end up sleeping here. It was like a sleepover every time. She can remember the day Callie had finally asked her to move in. Move in? She thought as Callie asked something that was not even a question due to the fact she practically lived here.

When Arizona became the head of the pediatric's unit, she was starting a new life. Living in Seattle. Meeting all of these news surgeons and interns. It was a new home. But, her true home was with Callie.

"Callie, look at me." Arizona began to speak, placing her hand on the side of Callie's face. Callie's eyes slowly opened as she began to tiredly stare at her wife.

"I know this place is important to you. This place is just as important to me. You made this our home. I never really had that. Especially moving around all the time when I was younger. But, what got me through all those moves is the fact I was with the people I love."

Arizona paused to kiss Callie on the forehead, hoping that would help pull sadness pouring out of Callie's eyes. It was a simple gesture but it was one that reminded Callie she wasn't alone. Then Arizona continued with her speech.

"I love you. And our daughter. You two are the most important people in my life. I base my decisions off of you. If we were to move, we would be okay. It of course would take a lot of time to adjust but we would make it through because we have each other. And every day that you are sad, I'll be there to pick you up because that is what a marriage is."

Callie didn't even have to look at her wife to know that she meant every word she said. Arizona had her faults, but she stayed true to the words like she had spoken. And she never once stopped loving Callie. She turned towards her wife, and nuzzled her head into her shoulder.

"I feel...I feel like if we leave this place that were abandoning the only thing left of Mark's." Callie finally admits after staying silent for a few moments.

"We are never abandoning him. Trust me. He will always be with us. Everywhere we go. And Sofia is our reminder. She has Mark's need for excitement and adventure. Okay?"

Callie shook her head as Arizona wrapped her arms around her wife and pulled her in closer to her.

"I guess I just got used to things. Having my best friend across the hall. Seeing all of my friends at work. Seeing you all the time at work. But, everything changed so quickly. When the plane fell from the sky, it crack the foundations of my world. And nothing has been the same. Everyday has been change. And I'm tired of it."

Puzzled and unsure of a response to sooth the pain her wife was experiencing, Arizona shut her eyes and thought back to the days when they were first dating.

"Callie,I know. I know that change is exactly the easiest thing. But look at us. I changed. We both did. At one point our daily routine would be considered my nightmare. Now,I wake up and wonder if it is all a dream because it is unreal how happy I am. Yeah,change can be bad. But it can be good."

Arizona had the ability to combine just the right words with facial expressions that would cause Callie's heart to melt. Even when they fought, she couldn't handle staying mad at her wife because she was just such a loving.

"Why do you always have to be right...I look so unstable next to you..." Callie responds in a sarcastic tone as she pulls Arizona into a hug.

"Cause I am right, and I'm awesome," Arizona says as she turns and kisses her wife goodnight.

Callie smiles as she looks at her wife. She was right, and yes she was incredibly awesome.

Change just happens. Sometimes we are ready for it. Majority of time, we are not. But it is the part of life that makes it worth living for. Being prepared making you aware of things, but it takes the excitement of what could be around the next corner.

Life is an adventure. Enjoy it.


	8. Chapter 8

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: 9x02? Arizona coming back to Seattle from the accident

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: I apologize for the delay, I was in Florida writing with no internet! Hope you all enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Coming Home

The sun was shining. Beaming through the trees just enough to wake Arizona from her sleep.

A sleep that was filled with a pulse that was thumping from her leg that was ripped open, flesh exposed to the wilderness that engulfed their plane that was suddenly ripped from the sky.

A sleep that was not even a sleep because she was in and out of consciousness as she continued to cough blood up and watch as Mark laid in her lap, closer to death than all of the others.

She closed her eyes and thought of the place that made her the happiest; home.

It seemed like it had been weeks and months since she had woken up in her bedroom with the sun shining in on Callie's face.

Arizona was usually the first to stir out of bed, unless Callie was already awake and staring at her wife, contemplating some kind of master plan within her mind.

But now, all of that was different.

Her eyes opened and everything faded away. She could still hear the noises of the engines as they shuttered and echoed throughout the woods.

Then, the noises began. The sound of choppers flying over them. This time, they were really going to be going home.

Fast Forward: Coming home to Seattle after the ride home "dumptruck" Idaho

Callie had already had five cups of coffee when she heard that the her wife along with the remainder survivors would be arriving in an hour.

She paced around the hospital with her hands in and out of her pockets. Crossing them across her chest. Bringing them to her lips. Fumbling with her charts as she stared at the clocks distributed throughout the walls of the entire hospital.

Finally, the sirens began. Callie bolted her way to the ER entrance, bracing herself for what she might see.

As all of the interns and residents began unloading the fellow Seattle Grace members, not a word was said.

Callie began to walk towards the ambulance that held her wife inside. Her smiley shiny wife who had so much joy, she could pass for a toddler in an adults body.

As the doors swung open, all Callie could see was blood. Blood spewing from her chest, blood spewing from her head. Blood that was flooding out of her leg. Or, more of what was left of her leg.

Callie moved in closer, unsure of what exactly she was really going to be looking at as she climbed into the ambulance.

She saw exactly what she needed.

Blue eyes staring at her, like they had been waiting for her all of this time. Blonde hair that was tangled in a mess, with leaves intertwined in the pieces but still held together by braids.

"Arizona,Arizona, I'm here. I'm right here and I'm never leaving your side. I've got you now." Callie began to say as tears immediately began to form heavily in her eyes.

Her eyes that were filled with sadness but a sense of relief that her wife was still alive.

"Cal-Callie. Thank god." Arizona croaked out as she closed her eyes and gripped her wife's hand tightly as if she needed it. Like it was her oxygen.

Callie was just trying to take everything in. Every ounce of pain flowing through her body as she stood here as her own wife, her Arizona, was covered in bruises and blood.

Why, why, why does this keep happening? Callie sat for a moment wondering. Finally, she snapped out of it as they began to move Arizona out of the ambulance and into the hospital.

Callie knew that she not only had to be strong being Arizona's wife, but also as her doctor.

Arizona was still in shock that she was alive. She just stared up as the white ceiling tiles flew by while they wheeled her through the emergency room.

Finally, the white blurs stopped and she was in a trauma room. Hands were everything as she assessed what type of injuries were beneath her hospital gown.

Callie walked into the room, hearing all of the medical terms being spewed out into the open. But, all she could do was stare at her wife.

Suddenly, she was met with blue eyes looking directly at her.

"Cal, Callie." She didn't need to say her name once more because Callie had already jumped to the side of the gurney to death grip Arizona's hands.

It soon became one hand as the doctors and nurses began connecting IV's and wires to her entire body. Soon, it seemed like Arizona's eyes were the only thing left for Callie to focus on.

Callie tried to form words, but she found herself filled with emotions swarming and stopping the ability for her to speak. Arizona shook her head and somehow managed to pull a smile on her face to let Callie know that everything would be okay.

It was there thing. They only needed their eyes to communicate. Everything they were feeling or needed to say could be seen in each others eyes.

Arizona closed her eyes as the doctors and surgeons continued to man handle her body. Callie knew that she too would have to take a look at the mangled flesh that was once apart of her wife's leg.

But for now, they just enjoyed the fact they were together.

Eventually, Arizona was moved to her own private room. They had dressed all of her wounds and stitched up the facial lacerations she had obtained. Callie was the last to work her magic,inserting medal rods to keep Arizona's femur in place and keeping any further nerve damage from occurring.

Finally, it was just her and Arizona in the room. Callie stood at the door listening to all the beeping coming from the machines that were monitoring Arizona's every breath.

Arizona turned her head and realized her wife was just staring sadly at her. Pain shooting from her eyes that were sunken into her face from the lack of sleep she had been dealing with after getting the news that the plane was missing.

"Come here." Arizona says breaking the silence as she waved her hands for Callie to come near her.

Callie pulled up a chair and sat beside her wife. But, for Arizona that was not good enough. She needed Callie. Physically needed her.

"No. Come here. Please." Arizona now demanded in a quiet but forceful tone as she patted her bedside and slowly began to shift over so Callie had room.

Callie was hesitant at first, not wanting to add pain to her wife who's entire body was battered and bruised. But as soon as Callie began to move, Arizona pulled her onto the bed.

"Alright I'm here. I just don't want to hug you or hold you too tight though, I might break you." Callie began's to say as she shifts into the bed.

"Callie, I need you to hold me. I need to know that I am actually home. That I am actually really here with you right now." Arizona begins to say as tears start to form in her eyes.

With that motion and the tears that are soon to come, Callie pulled Arizona off of her pillow ever so gently, and pulled placed herself behind her wife so she could rest her head on her chest. She wrapped one arm around Arizona's waist while she rested one hand on her head as she slowly caressed her hair.

"I'm here don't worry. I will hold you and I will never let go. Don't worry."

Arizona buried her head deeper into Callie's chest and grabbed her free hand. Within seconds she was crying. But Arizona was so numb, she didn't even realize that those were her own tears until she noticed Callie's lab coat was soaked.

Arizona soon fell asleep listening to Callie's heart beat. It was a constant sound that reminded her that she was not only safe, but that she was still alive.

Callie continued to brush Arizona's forehead with her hand until she heard the soft sounds of her snores against her chest. She placed a soft kiss upon the top of her head, careful to avoid any of the cuts and bruises that were in the process of healing.

At this point, every aspect of Callie's life was surrounding the process of healing.

But, healing was the just the beginning steps. It was the steps that they would take together. Arizona was alive.

So...

What did you guys think? I just felt like the show missed so many important interactions surrounding the plane crash and the events of the characters coming back to Seattle.


	9. Chapter 9

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Little bit before the wedding, Arizona starts to miss the little things in her life. It took me a long time to write this because most of it is from my life personally. Enjoy.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Grey's is back! Who's excited? Leave me reviews on what you want to read!

Disappear

As human begins, it is our nature to take the simple things in life for granted. But, ironically it is the simplest gestures that remind us how to be both grateful and thankful for what we have in life because life can aways be much more difficult.

Like I've said before, life changes in an instance. Even the most solid structures in our lives can crumble to pieces before find the time to fix them. In the blink of an eye you might not even recognize your own life. You feel as if you are walking in someone else's shoes. Living a life with no meaning,happiness, or joy.

You find yourself laying in bed staring at the ceiling replaying events of your life over and over in your head trying to determine what you could and should have done differently.

You find yourself standing in the shower for a lot longer than expected as you question the meaning of life only to be brought back to reality when you have used all of the hot water.

Next you are standing over the bathroom sink brushing your teeth. Suddenly finding yourself looking in the mirror at your reflection as both of your hands are gripping the sides of the cold white porcelain sink as you try to hold the tears in as your hands turn white from gripping so hard.

Trying so hard to keep the pain you feel locked inside your eyes. Your eyes that feel so heavy its no wonder that they are began to carry purple bags under them regardless of the amount of coffee that is traveling through your veins.

Reality is hitting you. All of this is real.

"Arizona...you have been in there for like an hour. If you keep brushing your teeth they might fall out of your mouth and keep in mind I am not dragging you back to the dentist and I do not build teeth. Only bones." Callie began's to say as she turns the door knob only to find that its locked.

"Sorry,sorry. I was just spacing out like usual." Arizona replies quickly while spitting out the remainder of the toothpaste in her mouth before opening the door.

"Alright well, we've got to get going or we're going to be late. And we have to get Sofia dressed which means we are pretty much going to be late regardless of what time we leave."

Arizona nods her head as she exits the bathroom, grabbing her cane and making her way to the kitchen. She stops to look at the table which is empty.

Before all of this mess and planes falling from the sky and all the death and pain, the empty table would have been filled with an assortment of homemade breakfast food and coffee. A never ending supply of coffee to ensure both doctors made it through their work day.

But much like many areas of Arizona's new life, the table was empty.

Ever since the constant screaming matches and objects being thrown her way, Callie had stopped doing her routine activities because nothing in her life was routine anymore. She was a stranger in her own life.

Her best friend was dead. Her wife was missing a leg. Her wife wouldn't leave their bedroom. Actually, her bedroom since Callie was vanished from sleeping there. She never thought this would be possible after actually having her wife in their home but she was somehow managing to miss her wife.

Arizona managed to completely ignore her wife walking straight in front of her until the scent of her shampoo and perfume entered her nose. She wanted to smile and cry at the same time.

"What are you looking at..." Callie said in a quiet and confused tone as she arched her eyebrow as she gazed at Arizona who just continued to stand there until reality hit her as her leg began to buckle.

Callie,being protective as always, ran out in front of Arizona, taking her by the arms to prevent her from falling onto the ground.

For once, Arizona let Callie catch her. She let her hold her. Not in a comforting sense, but in a protective sense. As if it was a test to see if Callie was still there to catch her from falling apart both emotionally and physically.

"Arizona...are you okay." Callie once again being the first to speak as she was met with her wife's blue eyes that were quickly filling with water.

"Yeah,sorry. Sorry. I was just thinking and forget about the fact that I can't exactly lean on something that is no longer there." Arizona replies in a serious but enlightening tone, one that shocks Callie as she nervously waits for the screams to begin.

Before Arizona had the chance to pull her wife into an embrace, to tuck back the hair that had fallen into her face, she realized that Callie had already lifted her back to feet and was handing her back her cane.

"Alright, well we really gotta go now. Sofia has more common sense than my interns have ever had in their entire lives. Pray for my patients who are having to deal with them since they will have to do my rounds."

Completely ignoring the words coming from her wife's mouth, Arizona just stands and stares before finally mustering up the strength to ask her wife a question.

"Did you already eat breakfast?" Arizona asks in a soft voice with her head tilted down, staring at the ground as she kicks her cane up and down with her good leg.

"Yeah, well no. I had coffee. Does that count? That is pretty much my new food group with everything that has been going on lately. Why are you hungry or something..."

Arizona finally brings her head up. The breakfasts made with love were gone.

"No, I'm fine. I guess...its just nothing."

"Arizona what is it? You can tell me." Callie says in a concerned voice as she puts her hand on top of her wife's shoulder.

"I just. I miss breakfast." Arizona says quickly scrunching her face realizing she probably sounds like such an idiot right now.

I miss breakfast? No. I miss you. I miss your smile. I miss holding your hand, gripping your wrist so hard that it leaves nail marks. I miss the feel of your bone breaking hands as they roam through my entire body,giving me goosebumps so large that it feels like my skin is no longer attached to my body. Attached. I miss us being one. I miss us.

"Oh...well I stopped making it after you not only threw multiple plates at the wall, but refused to eat anything I made you like it was tainted with rat poison..." Callie spits out quickly with a tone of rage and frustration. She slaps her hands to her forehead, immediately regretting her words.

Seriously Callie, why did you do just say that? The one time she is actually admitting to missing something that has to do with you and you go and blow it by being a big mouth. You are not a rockstar with a scalpel right now; you are a wife. Her wife. Be supportive. Focus. Do not give up this fight. You have worked too hard and too long to just let the universe win. She is yours. And you are hers.

Before Arizona, who now looks like someone broke her favorite barbie doll, could speak Callie takes a deep breath and continues her rant, attempting to fix the large amount of word vomit that involuntarily spewed out.

"I just made you sound like you were my slaveowner or something and you beat me...sorry. I didn't mean for it to sound like that."

"Its fine. I understand. I did kind of torture you for months..."

"Yeah, well..."

Before the awkward staring and watery eyes could began, both women were distracted by their toddler walking in pajamas with a blanket dragging across the floor.

"Welp,looks like someone is going to be rocking the Dora apparel today since I am not in the mood to get her dressed."

Fast Forward: Dinner Time

After a long day of back to back surgeries, Arizona was relieved to finally be in the comfort of her own home. She plopped down onto the couch and began to mentally wander off.

She thought about her brother, her parents, Mark, and Callie. She thought about all that she had lost. It suddenly dawned on her that she had not lost the one person who meant the most to her; Callie.

She needed to do something to show Callie how much she meant to her. It was her turn to feel know that she was loved.

Arizona continued to sit on the couch squinting her eyes half closed as she tried to figure out what act of kindness Callie would appreciate most.

Finally, she decided to do the things that Callie had once done for her.

A few hours later, Callie arrived home with Sofia sleeping on her shoulder. Since she had gone to daycare in her pajamas, Callie was able to put her to bed quite quickly, overcoming the frustrating fights of getting her daughter to actually stay in her bed.

She then made her way to the kitchen where she found her wife sleeping upright at the kitchen table.

"Um...Arizona...what exactly are you doing..." Callie began to spoke as she rubbed her wife's arm.

Arizona,unaware that she had fallen asleep, quickly jolted awake.

"Oh! Jesus. You scared me!" Arizona says in a startled voice as she smacks her elbow onto the corner of the table leaving a disgruntled look on her face.

"What is all of this? Did you cook?" Callie says as she begins to walk around the island of their kitchen.

"Yeah...I thought it would be nice if we had a dinner, you know just us. Like old times." Arizona responds with a sad but loving grin on her face.

Callie paused for a moment. Looking at the work her wife had gone through to make them both dinner. Something that would not have been done three months earlier. It was amazing that they were standing within close distance of each other without one crying as the other screams.

"You made us breakfast for dinner. This might just be my favorite new thing." Callie says with a smile so large that it causes Arizona to reflect just as big of a smile.

"Well take a seat and I want to hear all about your day."

Callie does as her wife says. Rather than sit in a far distance across the table, she decides to sit in the chair right next to Arizona.

After pulling her chair in and placing a few items on her plate, Callie stops and grabs Arizona's free hand.

"Thank you for this. You have no idea how much I have missed having dinner and breakfast with you." Callie says as she looks directly at her wife.

"And you have no idea how much I miss breakfast and lunch and dinner and everything about you. I miss you. And I miss us. And I can't thank you enough for putting up with me." Arizona says as she grips Callie's hand tighter.

They continued to finish their breakfast for dinner. It didn't matter what meal it was or what time of day it was, they were together. Some traditions may disappear but that doesn't mean you give up. You need to realize what you have in life and build. Build new traditions.


	10. Chapter 10

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: After Callie's speech in 9x19

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Sorry this took forever,college is a tad overwhelming sometimes!

Remember

Our minds are a complex structure. Our brain holds our reactions, opinions, and thoughts. Most importantly, our brain holds filing cabinets. These cabinets that seem to be in never ending rows hold folders. Folders that are filled with colorful pages that paint the pictures of our lives from the very first second on this earth to the final word we just released from our mouths.

Simply, they are our memories.

After finishing her TED speech given through the online video streaming, Callie thanked the Chief once more before grabbing her wife's hand and walking down the hallway to the locker rooms.

"I...I just wanted to say thank you. I know that cartilage and orthopedics is not the most exciting subject but it meant a lot to me for me to be able to give that speech." Callie said in a stern voice as she gripped both of Arizona's hands.

"Sometimes I forget how hard you really work. I am so used to you being on top of your game all the time that I forget to step back and remember how truly great you are. You are great,and so is your work. You are the most amazing and I mean amazing orthopedic surgeon on this planet. Not only is this hospital lucky to have you but so am I. So, this little thing was the least I could do for you." Arizona says, ending her statement with a smile.

Callie, unable to think of any other remarks to the perfectly pieced together statement her wife had just made, did the only thing she could do without words; kiss her.

"So...lets go home and celebrate your victory of finally overcoming your fear of public speaking. This still counts because you were on camera and still looked like you wanted to punch me or pass out at the beginning." Arizona says smiling even larger as she drags her wife down the hall.

After picking Sofia up from daycare, they continued their journey home heading towards the parking lot.

"Do you remember when good old Chief McDreamy made me do that presentation in front of everyone and I pretty much ruined my rep as the hard ass after spilling water everywhere and nervously dancing on stage." Callie says with a chuckle.

"Uhh...yeah I do because I had to spend all morning getting the puke out of your hair,which I never received any type of reward for by the way." Arizona replies.

"Well,that's when I knew you really did love me. You passed the puke test. Now if thats not true love I don't know what is." Callie says with a smile as she looks at Arizona, lifting her hand to her mouth and kissing her knuckles.

"I guess we are even. You had to clean up my messes. Especially after that one ladies night at Joe's," Arizona says sarcastically as she rolls her eyes.

"Which time? Are we talking about the time when you were so drunk that you fell asleep at the table drinking your beer with a straw or the type when I had to carry you home when you started crying because you missed your tiny humans," Callie says.

Arizona lifts her eyebrow in the air, attempting to recall either incident.

"Yeah,I don't really remember either one of those. I'm a light weight, what can I say!" she replies with a shrug of her shoulders.

"I'm glad you don't remember that. I had to carry you up the stairs and put you on the couch. Then when I brought you your pajamas you refused to change and instead pulled me on the couch."

"Ohhh,yes now I remember that. Don't finish the rest of that story. Sofia is listening you know," Arizona says as she looks to the backseat where their daughter has fallen asleep.

Callie shakes her head with a laugh before turning to look at her wife. It seems like it was just yesterday that the person sitting beside her was just a stranger. She at one point thought that the old Arizona was never going to appear again.

"Callie, I know I look cute in my scrubs and my hair that looks like a bird nest but you don't have to stare," Arizona continues as she pulls her hand into Callie's.

"Oh,what? Sorry. I was just thinking."

Thinking? About what Arizona begins to wonder. Is there something wrong? Did I say something to upset her?

"About what,are you alright?" Arizona replies in a worried tone as she begins to fidget in her chair like a child.

"I was just thinking about how glad I am that you are still here with me," Callie states in a stern voice as she continues to look Arizona directly in the eyes.

Arizona,who barely could keep her composure during Callie's speech, couldn't fight back the tears any longer.

"Damn it. Please don't cry I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you cry hun," Callie says as her eyes get wider watching her wife began to have a meltdown.

Arizona just shakes her head and continues to grip onto Callie's hand, unable to speak from the tears crushing down onto her cheeks.

Luckily they were only moments away from their apartment.

"I'll grab Sofia, you go ahead of us and wait by the elevator," Callie says after opening the door for her wife.

"Alright," Arizona replies in a quiet tone as she gently hops out of the car.

After a silent ride in the elevator, Callie put Sofia down to sleep hoping Arizona would snap out of whatever trance she had suddenly fallen into.

Callie stood in her daughters room for a moment, thinking back to the words that had been exchanged during the car ride and throughout the day. Wondering what could have been the trigger to set off Arizona.

She wandered back into the kitchen to find her wife with her head down sitting on one of the bar stools.

"Do you want to talk about it..." Callie says as she places a hand on Arizona's back and begins to rub circles, hoping she will open up.

"No." Arizona says bringing her hands to clear the fresh tears that have fallen from her eyes.

Callie continued to stare at her wife. Whenever she would cry,her eyes would change colors. They went from being a soft blue to a blue that was like the ocean. They were brighter and vibrant yet carried so much sadness within them.

"Alright, well I don't think sleeping here is going to be very good for your neck Arizona."

"I don't even want to move Callie. I'm so tired. Mentally and physically."

Callie put both hands on her thighs,contemplating what to do next. Should I continue to argue with her? Should I just sit with her? Should I just bring her a pillow and call it a night?

No. I'm her wife. This is our life. We both keep each other from falling apart. If she's falling apart then I will keep us together.

Like it was some type of ritual, Callie knew exactly what she was going to do.

She pulled Arizona's hands off of the countertop and moved the stool around so she was directly in front of her.

"Look at me, I'm here. I'm here and were fine." She said as she pulled Arizona out of the chair and begin to carry her to their bedroom.

Too weak to fight, Arizona clenched her hands onto Callie's hoodie and wrapped her legs around her waist. She hadn't even realized she was still crying until she noticed all the tears falling onto Callie's face.

Callie pushed the bedroom door open and gently placed her wife onto their bed. She straightened both of her arms out and stayed above Arizona, so close that their noses were almost touching.

"What's wrong. What is going on in that pretty little head of yours," Callie says as she begins to tuck Arizona's fallen strands of hair behind her ears.

"I think for the first time in so long I feel happy. I don't feel the anger anymore. I don't feel frustrated. But, then I think back to before all of this and I wonder if I am at all the same. If my life is the same. I feel like so much has been taken from not just me but us Callie," Arizona says as she brings her hands to cover her face as the tears continue to pour out.

Callie stayed in her position, looking down at her wife. She was so healed and yet so broken at the same time.

"I know. I know things have been horrible and now we are finally starting to have a normal life like we used to. I can't guarantee that things will always stay good. Bad things just happen. But, I do know that we will always have each other alright?" Callie says pulling her wife's hands away from her face, waiting for her to shake her head in agreement.

"We have made it through everything. We can deal with anything that is put in our lives. We have each other and thats all that matters. We have to remember the good and bad because it is what has gotten us here today and has made us the people we are today."

Arizona continued to cry. But, it wasn't a sad cry. It wasn't a broken cry. It was a cry of relief. She still had Callie. They were together. Through the good, bad,happy, and sad they had made it out.


	11. Chapter 11

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary:Sometime after 9x17

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: I have a few more chapters I'm working on. Might possibly start another story. What do you think?

Flashback

It was a Monday. Monday meant the ending of sleeping in and a new week ahead. But for doctors, they didn't have weekends. The days blended together so often that sometimes an entire week felt like one long day.

Callie found herself staring at the clock. Its only 9am she thought to herself. This is going to be the longest shift ever. Suddenly, she turned to see blonde hair bouncing around the corner.

"How in the world do you have that much energy this early in the day?" Callie questioned her wife who seemed to be radiating happiness off of her.

"Hmm...I don't know! Probably the joy of my job. And my adorable daughter. And my wife, she's pretty hot also." Arizona says as she kisses the side of Callie's face.

"Or maybe because you've had nine cups of coffee since I last saw you this morning when I had to practically drag you out of bed."

Arizona smiles, nodding her head in agreement knowing that if it was not for the coffee running throughout her veins, she would be sleeping in her office.

"Welp! I've got tiny humans to attend to. Here, you can have the rest of my coffee. You need it. For real." Arizona says with a smile as she pushes the coffee towards Callie.

"I was going to take it from you anyways so thank you. Good luck in surgery today." Callie says giving her wife a small kiss as a thank you for the coffee that will hopefully supply her with enough energy to make it through her busy schedule.

"Of course. Now go get moving!"

Callie smiled as she watched her wife walk away with her hands in her pockets. Making it half way down the hallway Arizona turned around to blow Callie a kiss.

Callie sat at the counter and began to get lost in thoughts rather than attending to her interns who could not even handle simple addition.

Finally she turned and headed to the elevator. Entering the doors opened she clicked the third floor button and continued to sip her wife's borrowed coffee, bopping her head to the music being played.

Suddenly, she stopped. It was not just any ordinary elevator music that could cause someone to fall asleep while drooling everywhere, it was their song. It was the song they had first danced to. Today was not just any ordinary Monday; it was the anniversary of their first date.

Rewind: The first date.

After a delightful meal from the best Italian restaurant in Seattle, Callie and Arizona began their journey back to Callie's apartment.

"I don't think Cristina and Owen are here so we should be safe. We can just watch a movie or something simple...if you want." Callie says as she glances over to the shorter beautiful women walking beside her.

"That sounds great to me!" Arizona replies showing off her trademark smile, a smile that Callie can't help but mimic back.

Once they had made it into the apartment, Callie soon realized that her movie selection was horrific. Literally. All they had were bloody gory movies, not the type of movie you watch with someone like Arizona,especially on a first date.

"Well, my movie selection sucks. And I don't think any video stores are open so..." Just as Callie was beginning to see the end of this night she never wanted to end she somehow managed to click the stereo on.

Arizona immediately began bopping her head from side to side.

"Alright, alright. So,lets dance instead!" She says as she grabs Callie's hands and laces her own fingers within them.

Callie nods and lets Arizona take the lead as she continued to hold onto Callie's hands as they bounced across the living room. Then, Callie realized she knew the song that was on.

"Ohhh this is a good one!" Callie says as she puts her hands on Arizona's hips.

As little pieces plays throughout the speakers the two danced together in the moonlight. It wasn't a formal dance that required both of them looking directly into ones eyes,it was a fun dance. An enlightening dance that allowed them to be themselves. A dance that filled the room with Arizona's laughter and Callie's singing.

Finally, after dancing to what seemed like twenty songs, the two fell back into the couch behind them.

"This was the best first date ever." Arizona says as she turns to look at Callie.

Callie continues to stare at Arizona in awe, still surprised that she is seriously out on a date with this amazing women.

"Yes, yes it was. Do you want to see what's on tv?" Callie says as she gets up to find the remote.

"Actually...I kinda want to watch one of your scary movies. If that's okay with you. I eventually need to get over my fear of all that stuff." Arizona says tilting her head sideways as she blinks her eyes widely at Callie.

"Well sure,but I am not responsible if you can't sleep for the next few months, deal?"

Arizona laughs,knowing that she probably won't sleep regardless after this date Callie.

"Deal!" Arizona says with a thumbs up.

Callie searched through her massacre movie selection to find the one movie that wouldn't bring total fear to Arizona.

Within minutes of the movie starting, Arizona had already pulled herself into a ball with a blanket half covering her face.

After one scene, she managed to jump from her seat and latch onto Callie's arm.

"Sorry..." Arizona said sheepishly as she looked up towards Callie.

Not phased by Arizona's nervousness about the movie, she pulled her arm around the small women beside her and pulled her into an embrace.

"You comfy?" Callie asks as she rubbed the side of Arizona's arm.

"Perfect. This is perfect." Arizona replies as she snuggles her head against Callie.

Without hesitation, Callie leans forward and places a kiss on the top of Arizona's head. So it wasn't a passionate kiss that ended up with sweaty bodies meshing together. So it wasn't a face to face kiss. It was a simple care gesture. A gesture that showed Arizona that Callie was a protector.

Back to reality.

Suddenly, the elevator stopping and the binging noise of the doors opening brought Callie back into the real world.

Bailey suddenly appeared in front of Callie, startling to the point that she almost dropped her coffee.

"Torres...whatever world you were just dancing in you need to come back to hospital land and I need a consult on a patient with a broken leg and I don't want a doctor operating on him while she's in pretty pony land"

Callie began to laugh and shake her head.

"Yes, I'm back in my world now. Real life." She replies smiling as she sips her coffee.

After a work day that seemed to go on for ages, Callie finally made it home. Arizona's surgery had been pushed to tomorrow so she was able to get home and put Sofia to bed.

Callie walked into their apartment finding Arizona already asleep on the couch.

"Hey, hun you should probably move to the bed. You falling asleep out here is becoming a bad habit of yours." Callie says as she gently rubs the side of her wife's arm.

"Mmm..what? Dang it. So much for staying up huh." Arizona says as she puts her hands over her face as she tries to avoid the bright lights from the kitchen.

"Come on,lets go to bed." Callie says as she begins to help her wife to her feet.

After changing into her pjs, Callie was finally able to climb into her bed. Her own bed that actually didn't have metal springs sticking out of it as opposed to the on call rooms at the hospital. Shockingly, Arizona had somehow managed to keep herself awake while Callie was changing.

"Hi." Arizona says as she turns to face her wife.

"Hi sleeping beauty." Callie says with a chuckle as she kisses the top of her wife's head.

Arizona smiles and snuggles closer into Callie's side. Callie automatically pulls her head down to rest on top of Arizona's.

"Arizona?" Callie says as she pushes the curly locks that haven fallen onto her wife's head.

"Hmmm" Arizona responds in a sleepy tone.

"I love you. And our life. Regardless of everything we've been through and regardless of what we might go through in the future. And I love our story."

Arizona found herself quickly awake again after hearing the heartfelt words that were coming from Callie's mouth.

"You never stop amazing me which is one of the reasons I find myself loving you more and more everyday. Our story is pretty cute huh?" Arizona responds as she grips onto one of Callie's hands.

"It is. One for the record books. We've got to start dancing again." Callie says nervously, hoping Arizona will be up to dance for the first time since the amputation.

"I would love to dance with you again." Arizona say with a smile.

"Alright, dance date it is! Now we both need to sleep." Callie says kissing her wife as she turns off the light beside them.

"Goodnight." Arizona replies as she continues to toy with the necklace hanging around her wife's neck.

Sometimes we find ourselves cherishing the smallest memories in our lives. But,those are the memories that build our stories. Those little pieces that attribute to whole that makes us the people we are. The people who will always love each other. The people who will cry with you, smile with you, and always support you.


	12. Chapter 12

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Early part of season 9

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: So, is began to write a new chapter, but I found myself deleting all the words and starting over. I felt like something was missing. In this chapter I wanted to focus on that critical moment where they had the one fight that changed everything. I really felt like the writers missed so many awesome opportunities to show how much pain these two faced this season.

Underdog

I have had enough. She sits in her bed. Her bed that was our bed. All day. She won't move, and when she does its only to grab the nearest object to throw at me to stop me from talking. Sometimes I wonder who this stranger is that I am suddenly rooming with. Where is my wife? Why can't I just get a break. Why can't she realize that the decision I made was to save her life. It did save her. How would Sofia have felt only being left with one parent?

These were the thoughts crammed into the little free spots of Callie's mind. The free spots that didn't hold the numerous amounts of medical science that has consumed all of her life. Then again, what life?

A life that not included sleeping in her dead best friends apartment. Picking up extra hours at work to avoid the disastrous confrontations that wait for her at home. A home that is more of a prison under the dictatorship of Arizona. Her Arizona. The Arizona full of childish delight. All of that was gone. Their home was dark. It was filled with hostility.

They had been living in complete silence, except from the sudden outburst fueled by the rage of Arizona missing her limb.

Callie had returned from another excruciating day at the hospital. She parked her car and just sat there with her head resting against the steering wheel.

Should I even bother going in? I wonder what the argument is going to start with today? Stop. Stop, she's my wife and I love her. No matter what. We stick together.

Callie managed to drag herself out of the car carrying her bags that seemed to be weighing her down. Or was that the constant weight of the family she was forced to be the sole provided for? She was now the glue keeping everything from completely crumbling.

The skies soon began to change. The sun quickly hid behind the black storm clouds that sent thrusts of thunder throughout the air. Then, it began to pour.

Callie stood still and began to look up to the sky.

"Why...just why...the one day I don't have my umbrella. Mark this is a really sick joke. Give me a break. Please. I just...I need a break." Callie says as she drops her bags to the ground and begins to throw her hands into the sky.

The raindrops begin to splash onto her face but she can't feel them. Her tears mix in with the rain and she finds herself dropping to the curb, placing her hands over her face to hide the massive amounts of uncontrollable sobbing. Sobbing that had been held deep inside her chest for months.

Arizona, who had been sleeping in bed like usual, was startled by the sound of the storms creeping through her window. She soon sat up, staring at the clock wondering where her wife was.

She grabbed ahold of her crutches and began to move towards the window to watch the rain. Suddenly, she saw someone had dropped their bags on the sidewalk. Then, she realized that next to those bags was her wife. For a second Arizona thought she was praying.

Why in the world is she praying on the side of the street in the rain...Wait. She's not praying. She's crying.

Is this the end of us? Is this how our story ends. Africa. Sleeping with her best friend. Car accidents. Falling out of the sky. Losing Mark and Lexie. Losing my leg. What was left to lose?

After being completely drenched from the monsoon, Callie made her way up to her apartment. She found herself standing at the door, jingling her keys in her hands.

Before she had the chance to turn the door, Arizona whipped the door open. She stood there staring at Callie for a moment.

"Are you going to stand there or come in and change because you're dripping wet." Arizona says as she leans on one crutch so she can hand her wife a towel.

"Yeah. I'm coming." Callie says as she drops her things and slams the door behind her.

"Woah, no need to slam things. Its just water." Arizona says as she moves over towards the couch.

"Oh right, I'm sorry. You're right. Its just water. Don't worry. I'll be fine. I always am. I forgot that its all about you." Callie says as she slams her hands onto the kitchen bar.

Startled by Callie's sudden burst of anger, Arizona just glares at her wife in anger.

"What the hell are you doing. Who do you think you are throwing a fit like that. Yeah! Its just water. Come talk to me when you lose a le-"

"NO NO NO." Callie screams while cutting Arizona off from finishing her typical response to anything Callie has had to say for the past three months.

Thats it. I am done. I have had enough. This is my turn to talk.

"Its just water huh? Yeah its water. Like the tears that I've held in for the past three months while you sit in bed and hate your life. You are alive. I don't understand." Callie says in a stern voice and she begins to travel closer and closer to Arizona.

"Callie..." Arizona begins to say as she continues to stare at her wife.

"No. You don't get to talk right now. I have listened to your screams. I have cleaned up your urine. I have dealt with your words that are so hurtful that sometimes I question if this is really the Arizona that I was in love with. The Arizona I was married to." Callie says, putting her heads on her head in an attempt to lower her spiking blood pressure.

"You lost a leg. I know I don't fully understand how you feel but you are still Arizona Robbins. You are still the best pediatric surgeon out there. You are such an amazing person both inside and out. I know that is still in you. I understand that you are pissed at me, but put yourself in my shoes for two seconds." Callie says as she crumbles to her knees in front of Arizona.

"Think how you would feel. You're missing. You come home. Then Karev is telling me you're flat lining. Was I supposed to let my wife die? Let the mother of my child die? Our child Arizona, did you think about her? Her father is already gone." Callie says in defeat.

A defeat that leaves her unable to speak any further. It is now just the sound of the rain pelting against the window and Callie's muffled breathing as she continues to bawl her eyes out.

"I know." Arizona says in a cracked voice as an overwhelming amount of emotion suddenly bursts out of her heart.

"I'm not sure what happened to me to be honest. You are my the one structured thing in my life. I know I will always have you. But, I don't know if I even want myself in my own body yet alone having to think about you dealing with me in your life."

"This..this isn't yours or mine Arizona. Its ours." Callie manages to say as she picks up her head to look at Arizona.

Arizona shakes her head as she sees the bloodshot Brown eyes that are staring at her. Eyes that are now forming bags under them.

"It is, isn't it."

"I know that this has been living hell for you. I know you were trying to save me. It is just so frustrating to lose apart of you Callie. I lost so much of myself in those woods...I don't know if I will ever come back." Arizona says as she breaks eye contact with her wife and looks outside at the storms.

"You didn't lose everything Arizona." Callie says as she wipes the new formation of tears slowly falling down her face.

Arizona closes her eyes for a second before turning back to Callie,knowing she is referring to their marriage. Their marriage that somehow managed to survive all of these bad things that just continue to happen to them.

"You know, sometimes I wish it was someone else. Someone else who had made the call to cut off my leg because I cry in bed all alone and what I really want is you."

"I want you to lay with me and hold me so tight that I won't even doubt that everything will be okay. But, you can't do that because you are the villain in this screwed up story. And at the same time you are the hero because you saved my life. You saved me." Arizona says as she grabs onto to Callie's face.

Callie's eyes begin to get wider and wider until she feels like they are going to pop out of her head. She finds herself feeling almost dizzy, like she's in a trance of some sort.

"What." Callie says. The only word she is able to speak as she is distracted by her wife's sudden emotional and physical revelation.

"Yes. I mean it. You saved me Callie." Arizona says as she leans her head up against Callie's forehead.

The sudden closeness of her wife that had been so distant only prompts Callie to cry harder and harder. Until she can barely breathe.

"Hey, hey, its okay. Calm down. Okay? We're going to get through this. Somehow. We always do. Just don't stop fighting because I know I never have. Even when I was spewing blood out of my mouth watching the darkness creep upon on us for the third day out on in those woods. Don't stop fighting Callie." Arizona says with tears as she continues to lean her head against her wife's.

"I won't ever stop fighting. I love you too much to give you up. Especially for a reason like this" Callie says as she grips Arizona's wrists.

Callie and Arizona continued to sit together, gripping each others hands as they listened to the storms. The storms that were almost telling the story of their life.

The storms shadow over the sun. They come suddenly. They bring rain, or tears. They send thunder, the fights. And lightning, the injuries both physically and emotionally. But, the storms eventually disappear and the light returns.

Sometimes you have to let it all out. You have to stop holding it all together because we are human. We are meant to crack into a million pieces and rebuild ourselves. And with each rebuild, we find ourselves getting stronger. Better prepared for whatever twisted path is in our future.

Sometimes you find yourself down. But, you are definitely not out.


	13. Chapter 13

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Events surrounding 9x23-9x24

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: Well, the season finale pretty much broke my heart as I watched my two favorite characters have all of their progress within one season destroyed in ten minutes.

Dark Blue

The storm had passed. The black storm clouds that danced above the skies of the hospital had finally disappeared. The massive roars of thunder shaking the windows had ceased.

Scratch that, the storm had just began as Callie and Arizona stood at opposite ends of the conference room. Between them was emptiness. Emptiness that now held the silence after the screaming match had occurred.

They had come so far. They had gone from being roommates to lovers. From enemies to the best of friends they once had been. They had finally restored the closeness that had been ripped suddenly from their everyday lives after the plane crash, the amputation and the months of torture that followed.

How did we get here? How could the person I trust the most be the same exact person who has now caused me the most pain? What did I ever do to deserve this. I saved her life. I have spent every waking moment ensuring that she will get the life she once had back.

Those were the very thoughts vastly traveling through Callie's mind as she stared at this stranger in front of her.

Arizona was in shock. In shock that Callie had the nerve to think she understood the physical and mental pain she faced and still faces on a daily basis. Death heals. Wounds heal. Legs don't grow back.

Arizona was at a loss of words after watching the veins bulging from Callie's neck as they spoke of the adultery that would be the next thing to tear their marriage apart.

Had she lost me? Better yet, have I lost myself? Arizona thought as she continued to watch her wife bawl her eyes out in front of her.

Arizona had never seen so much pain in Callie's eyes. It was like they were bleeding tears down her tan face.

They continued to stand in silence after Callie had last spoken. They were exhausted. They had fought for their patients all day, and now they battled for their own marriage. A marriage that was now more torn and twisted than it had ever been before.

Their was pure silence between them. All that could be heard were the massive sobs coming from the two women who loved each other so much, but yet were the ones who hurt each other the most.

Fast Forward: Two hours later.

At some point, the storm picked up again resulting in another power outage.

Famished from the screaming match, and practically draining their entire bodies of fluids from the mass amount of crying, Callie and Arizona somehow collapsed onto the couch between the middle of the room. It was the divider between them.

Callie awoke after being startled from a large roar of thunder echoing throughout the dark nights sky. She began to push her hair out of her face as she attempted to figure out where she was, and why her other arm was half asleep.

Suddenly, both of her brown eyes shot open as she realized that this was not a pillow or blanket laying next to her; it was Arizona.

We must have just fallen asleep after crying so much, Callie thought as she glanced at her watch.

Callie stared at her sleeping wife beneath her. Should I leave? Should I move her? This is my opportunity to run. To leave.

No,no,no. I can't. I love her. I can't change that. She cheated. But, I still love her. I always will. All of the memories came flowing feverishly into Callie's mind. Joe's. Dancing. Pizza night. Being girlfriends. The shooter. The move in. Africa. The car accident. The wedding. Planes falling from the sky. Please, don't run.

Before she has the opportunity to follow through with any of her plans she realized that Arizona was no longer sleeping. Arizona is now crying so hard that she is shaking the both of them as they are awkwardly positioned on this uncomfortable couch.

"I'm here. It's me, it's Callie." Callie says as she begins to brush Arizona's hair out of her face.

"I...I thought I was having a nightmare. Everything seemed so real." Arizona says as she pulls her hands to cover her eyes.

Then she opens her eyes and looks into Callie's eyes. Callie's brown eyes that are surrounded with purple bags. Callie's eyes that seem colorless, and emotionless. In fact, her entire face seems that way as Arizona begins to shift her eyes around.

"Oh my god...it wasn't a nightmare. This is real." Arizona says as she begins to cry harder.

Callie just stares at her, unsure of how exactly to react to this situation.

Callie does what comes naturally for her; she comforts her wife.

"Yeah, its a real nightmare. Just go back to sleep. We can pretend for now its not real and just be us right here." Callie says as she pulls her wife into her chest as she wraps her arms around her body.

"Callie. Make it stop. Make it all stop." Arizona cries out as she death grips Callie's hands.

Callie loses her composure as she is met with Arizona's eyes staring directly at her.

"It never stops Arizona. It never stops."

Callie just closes her eyes and shakes the tears away. She places a kiss on the top of Arizona's head and continues to hold her. They both hold each other as they sit on that couch crying, and incredibly broken.

Her eyes once had this blue tint to them. It wasn't like a blue you could even perfectly describe. It was almost like the color of the ocean when the sunlight reaches it at a perfect angle. They were filled with such vibration. Passion. Love. They were the irresistible characteristic that made Arizona who she was.

Now, they were empty. They weren't bright or sparkly; they were dark. They were mysterious. They were dark blue. The color blue the ocean turns when a storm causes massive waves, sending white caps floating every which way.

They storm had passed, but her eyes remained dark blue.


	14. Chapter 14

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Events surrounding 9x23-9x24

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Note: I am in the process of watching every episode from the beginning. It is kind of giving me some new ideas.

Spinning

Time. It is a four letter word that is used on a daily basis. Sometimes we don't even realize we have spewed the word out of our mouths. Time comes and goes so quick that we don't even have an exact measurement to explain how fast our lives move. Does that make sense? Scratch that. I don't care what makes sense because our lives don't make sense a majority of the time.

Time makes or breaks us. It builds and breaks us. Time.

Just like the storms roaming through the Seattle skies, the monsoon that had hit and destroyed the foundation of Callie and Arizona's marriage continued to travel through the air.

Callie had once again found herself sleeping on the couch.

Here I am. Again. Sleeping on an uncomfortable couch in my own house while my wife. MY wife, the cheating one, sleeps in her bed. Her bed which was once ours, but now its filled with nothing but lies.

Callie continues to stare outside the window, wondering when both the storm in and outside of her home will stop. When the rain would let up Callie could hear the sound of muffled crying coming from the walls beside the couch.

At the same time, Arizona was hidden under a massive pile of pillows and tissues, shielding her eyes from the bright strikes of lightning that continued to crash against the windows of their dark apartment.

Their bedroom was so quiet. So empty. All of Callie's belongings were still where they had last been, but it wasn't the same without having Callie there.

They had somehow managed to avoid the talk that needed to happen. Well, the talk that would answer the question of where do we go from here?

Arizona felt guilty for what she had done, but her motive wasn't to hurt Callie. She wasn't seeking revenge. She had simply let go.

A large roar of thunder and lightning brought Arizona back to reality as the power suddenly went out. Awesome, she says to herself.

Callie, startled by the power outage jumped from her almost half asleep slumber from the couch. She first went to check on Sofia, who was still sound asleep. She then decided that she was going to check on Arizona.

No matter what she had done, she wanted to ensure that she was safe. She was her protector no matter what was happening.

Next Callie began to travel down the hallway leading to the bedroom. Her bedroom. Their bedroom. Callie began to cringe seeing their wedding picture hanging in the hallway.

Where did I go wrong? What should I had done differently? What could I have said to her?

Callie sighed as she knocked and slowly opened the door. Arizona soon popped out from the pillows and began to wipe the fresh tears that were pouring down her face.

"Hey..I just wanted to check and make sure you're ok..." Callie begins to say when she moves in their bedroom.

The darkness is hiding the piles of blankets that have fallen to the ground, leading Callie to soon trip and fall. This fall also leads to Callie, who is not the most graceful, hitting her head right into the edge of their bed.

"Oh my, oh my god, Callie! Are you okay!?" Arizona says quickly as she jumps off her side of the bed to find Callie at the edge of their bed with both of her hands covering her face.

"Callie, let me see. Are you okay?" Arizona as she pulls her wife's hands away from her face to realize that Callie is laughing.

"What...what. Why are you laughing, you are bleeding?" Arizona says in confusion as she sits directly next to her wife.

"I'm laughing because I came to check on you and now I'm the one who is hurt. I'm the one with no best friend and now no wife. I'm the one who's been cheated on. Do you get it? You lost your leg. I've lost everything now." Callie says as she stares at her wife.

"Yeah...I realize that. I don't even recognize my life sometimes. Sometimes I don't even know who I am looking at in the mirror." Arizona says as she sits next to Callie.

"I feel like I'm married to this ghost. A ghost that comes and goes whenever she pleases. It is like you are a different person everyday Arizona. I can tolerate the hateful words, and the blame for what I did but I can not handle that fact that you cheat...you know what why am I even talking to you right now?" Callie snaps quickly.

"I..I don't really know what to say Callie. I'm sorry is what I want to say but at the same time I don't want to. It was like I was free. In that moment my leg didn't matter. It was like someone liked me and was seeing me as the person I am today. For you that doesn't make sense because you are with me everyday. You've been with me from my first day at the hospital. Lauren didn't know the bubbly old Arizona. You did" Arizona says as tears begin to stream down her face

"Arizona I don't understand what I have to do to make you understand that I love you. I love you from the moment you kissed me. I don't ever plan on letting go of you but now I'm wondering if that is even up to me at this point." Callie says as she pulls her hand to stop the onset of tears trickling down Arizona's face.

"I'm afraid that you are in love with the old Arizona, and not the one who is sitting in front of you today."

Callie stops to turn and look at Arizona.

Was she in love with the old Arizona? Was she stuck in the past relying on constant replays of the old Arizona that she kept in her mind?

"I went through the windshield of your car. I almost died. Sofia almost died. When I woke up, you were the first person I saw. You were the only person I wanted to see. Not once did I blame you. Do you know why Arizona?"

"No..I don't think I ever thought of any of this before.."

"Because I love you. I love you so much to the point where my body was practically shutting down, but I made it through because I couldn't imagine living life elsewhere without you by my side." Callie says as she puts her hands up to her face.

"Callie...please don't cry. Please." Arizona says as she tries to pull Callie's hands away from her face.

"Arizona I forgave you without even asking for an apology. I saved your life and you hate me for it."

Callie had a point. The car accident was my fault. The plane crash wasn't hers. She even tried to stop me from going. She saved my life, and yet I hate her for it.

"When I look at you Callie I am so happy because I know you are the person who loves me the most, the person who would do anything for me and the person who knows me best. At the same time I look at the person who took away the most from me. It tears me apart inside."

"Until you let yourself forgive me we are going nowhere with this marriage. If this was anyone else this marriage would be over. Is it over Arizona?"

To be continued.


	15. Chapter 15

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: After 9x24, some references to early season 9

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Author note: I was glad that I got some reaction out of people in the reviews. I do not support cheating whatsoever. I am not favoring Arizona over Callie. Also, please keep in mind that this is fiction. This is clearly the last thing we ever wanted to happen to Calzona. I keep watching the season finale because I might be in denial.

Original Sin

Have you ever had a moment where time completely stops? A moment where people are talking and moving but you don't see a thing. You don't hear a thing. Everything is dark.

You suddenly find yourself replaying crucial moments in your life over and over again. Its like a nightmare that won't disappear.

It is a constant reminder of all the things that have gone wrong in your life. It is that scar that continues to be broken open. It is a scar that never heals.

What do you do when your worst nightmare is your own wife. The person that is supposed to be your best friend. The person who you share everything with.

Suddenly you realize that you are alone. Your best friend is dead, and the other best friend is there physically but mentally, she has been missing for months.

"Torres...Torres!? Anyone in there!" Alex begins screaming as he stands in front of Callie who has been staring at the wall for what seems to be hours now.

"Wha..what? Yeah I'm fine whats up?" Callie says as she shakes her head in an attempt to bring herself back to reality while pushing her hands into her pockets.

"I need you on a consult in Peds. This kid fell from a tree fort. Pretty nasty break" Alex says as he begins walking and hands Callie the charts.

Immediately Callie's head pops up to reveal her eyes have already become wide and filled with tears.

"Um...can you page someone else? I've got..a really packed schedule." Callie says.

A packed schedule? I would clear my entire week for this surgery. I would never pass the chance to break bones back into place, especially to help a child. But I just can not be around Arizona. Not now. Not today. Not tomorrow.

"Are you sure..you know I don't have to tell Arizona if that's what you are worried about." Alex stops and says while staring at a obviously very exhausted Callie.

"No, its fine Alex. I'll take a look." Callie says with a sigh as she follows him up to Peds floor.

Callie and Arizona were both broken. Arizona, although she claimed to be, was not healed. The scars that were visible might have made progress but she had not. Because of her poor choices, both Arizona and Callie were suffering.

History was once again repeating itself.

How could she see me as selfish? Wanting the warrior wound, I am the warrior. I saved her fricken life. I was there every second. Where was everyone else? I never stopped loving her. Find someone else who would clean up her urine after the months of torture she put me through.

Those were the constant thoughts swarming through Callie's head as she wandering through the cold white floored hospital that had once been her home.

Now it was a battlefield. A place of discomfort. The place she lost her best friend. The place her wife lost her leg. This was the very place that both of her marriages had now been destroyed by the one sin no married person wants to face, cheating.

Where do you turn? Who do you talk to? Who can you trust? The most important questioned to be answered is how do you go about picking up the shattered pieces of your life.

Callie had been put through hell and back. She had never once turned her back on Arizona, even after months of sleeping in her dead best friends bed, crying in storage rooms and going to events to speak for her wife who refused to get out of her bed. Her bed, that was once their bed.

Her she was once again sleeping in Mark's bed. Sneaking back into her apartment to pick Sofia up and take her to daycare.

It wasn't that she was hiding from Arizona, it was that she could not even stand to look at her. It was making her nauseous just knowing she had the nerve to kiss someone else. The fact of reality that she slept with someone else made Callie want to go on a bone breaking spree.

Callie stepped off the elevator slowly, peering her head around the corners to see if Arizona's bright blonde hair was visible.

Taking in a deep breath, she begin to walk down the hallway with her coffee in one hand while reading over the chart.

She found that she was reading but nothing was sticking. It was like she was reading those charts at the doctors office with the small letters that suddenly all morph together.

I think you'll know.

I can't live without you or our ten kids.

We are together and none of the rest of it matters.

Can you live for me?

Please don't run.

You didn't lose anything.

How things change so quickly. How did I get where I am today. How much longer can my knees keep me standing. Eventually they will buckle. Eventually the bags under my eyes that carry the pain I've been feeling will give out as well.

How much longer can I pretend that I am okay?

"Hey what room is Sam Gilbert in, it says 222 but that room is empty?" Callie asks a nurse at the Peds counter.

"Hmm. I'm not sure where they moved him. Give me one second and I'll page Dr. Robbins, I know she will know for sure." the nurse responds as she motions to pick up the phone.

"No..NO! That won't be needed. I will find the patient myself." Callie says as she yanks the folder from the nurse and begins to walk away.

Distracted with her frustration that has been building continuously, Callie fails to notice Arizona walking around the corner. Without looking up once, Callie smacks directly into her wife causing her entire chart to break open, spilling papers everywhere.

"Oh Callie! Gosh you scared me!" Arizona says as she leans against the glass window with her hands over her chest.

Callie refuses to make eye contact with her as she kneels on the ground to pick up the fallen papers.

"Here, let me help." Arizona says as she tries her best to kneel to the ground.

Callie stops and looks at her wife kneeling in front of her. She notices she is still wearing the necklace and her wedding ring.

Unsure of exactly how she felt by what she just saw in front of her very eyes, she rips the papers from Arizona's hands and begins to run down the hallway.

Arizona continues to sit on the ground with her head resting against the wall.

Was one night of feeling pretty worth destroying my marriage. My marriage with the person who is my entire life here in Seattle?

Callie found the first storage room she could find and sat down with her hands on her knees and closed her eyes.

It was the first time she had complete silence all day.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door.

"What." Callie says as she turns to look at the door.

"Callie...can..can I come in please?" Arizona says in a quiet voice.

Callie continued to sit on the ground with no response.

"Arizona what are you doing here. Better yet, how did you find me." Callie says as she slaps her hand onto her forehead.

"Callie, I'm your wife. I know your hiding spots." Arizona says as she shuts the door and awkwardly stands across from her visibly disheveled wife.

"Oh..now you're my wife huh?" Callie says with a chuckle as she death stares Arizona.

"Yeah...why wouldn't I be? What does that even mean Callie?" Arizona says as she sits on the ground, tired of standing with Callie's harsh stares practically looking through her.

"Now your my wife. Where was my wife when she slept with another women. Another women in the SAME hospital we work at. Was that another person then? Are you suddenly back to normal now Arizona?" Callie says in a fit of rage.

"Callie. I.." Arizona begins to say before Callie quickly cuts her off.

"NO. NO. NO. I understand you lost a leg. THAT WAS ALMOST A YEAR AGO. I saved you, and you go and cheat on me? After months of me sleeping alone. Months of me practically living in a dorm room with a roommate who hated me? You don't get to go and make excuses for this one Arizona Robbins. There is no excuse for cheating. To be honest, you are a hypocrite for even doing it." Callie says as she begins to get off the ground and head towards the door.

"Callie.. Wait! Don't go!" Arizona says as she tries to get up and follow Callie.

"Don't go? Arizona I didn't leave. The second you slept with that women you checked yourself out of this marriage. Now you can sit here in this storage room and cry over the fact your wife is gone just like I did. Your not the only one with warrior wounds." Callie says as she grabs Arizona's arm and pulls at her scrub top to reveal the scar that she had gotten from the car accident.

Not even a second later, Callie left the room slamming the door with all of her strength.

For the first time it was Callie finally able to walk away from the situation. It was Arizona who was left in the dark storage room to think about what she had done. What she had really lost.

Forgiveness revolves around forgetting, a task that our mind finds troubling. We constantly try to fix the things that have been broken in our lives. Both sides view themselves as the victims. Both sides view the others as the villains.

It is a constant battle of who can act like they care less, or who will be the bigger person. The person to glue the hanging pieces of that relationship back together.


	16. Chapter 16

Title: Understanding

Author: Jrn77

Pairing: Callie/Arizona

Summary: Aftermath of the Season Finale.

Rating: T for now

Disclaimer: All characters belong to ABC/Shonda Rhimes.

Author Note: I hope all of you readers are having a wonderful summer. I look forward to reading your reviews! I also will hopefully be writing a few more chapters in the future. Enjoy.

Into the Hurricane

Storms sweep through the sky in seconds. They can last minutes, sometimes even seconds. It is quite astonishing to look around and view how much damage a storm can create. It can destroy the foundation of any building. It can rip through the homes of families and demolish every inch of their most prided objects. Objects that were pieces of the puzzle that made those cookie cutter houses unique in their own way.

The saying is calm before the storm, but the true silence is after the storm.

Callie found herself on the couch, suddenly wakened by the alarm chiming off from her cell phone.

Of course on my one day off I forget to turn the alarm off she thinks to herself as she sits up and begins to brush her hair from her eyes. She could actually feel the bags that had began to form under her eyes from the lack of sleep she had been receiving since the storm ripped through the hospital.

It was still dark outside, but the Seattle sunrise was slowly starting to peer over the treetops in the distance.

It had been a week since the storm came to Seattle and turned Callie's world into a disaster. She was living in her house with a ghost. A ghost that had once been her other half. Her wife was not her wife anymore. She was like a roommate. A roommate whom you would see around the hospital- or in Callie's case that ex-girlfriend you would try hardest to avoid.

The ex you would do anything to avoid so you wouldn't have to stare directly into her ice blue eyes. Those eyes that you would find yourself getting lost in. The eyes that you would look into for love, support and protection. The eyes that changed colors so quickly the second Arizona was unloaded off the ambulance that carried her to the hospital after falling from the sky.

Callie sat with her hands covering her eyes as she attempted to shake all of the memories playing in front of her very eyes. Her own eyes that had become so much darker, filled with the pain and guilt she carried on an everyday basis.

She was carrier. She had become the protector. She was Arizona's wife. She was her doctor. She had to be all three parents in one for Sofia. Sofia who had lost her dad, Callie's own best friend. Sofia, who's Mama couldn't find the strength to spew anything but scaring words towards her wife.

She had saved her life physically but, emotionally there was no way of saving Arizona from the everyday reminder of the pain she faced. The everyday scars both visibly and mentally.

Callie wondered how Arizona was doing. She wondered if she was sleeping. If she was eating. If her leg was hurting.

She missed her wife. She missed her life.

They had been completely avoiding one another at the hospital, hopping on elevators, running past each other and sitting at opposite ends of the cafe just to avoid having to face their marriage that was now failing.

Callie knew she could not just forgive Arizona for what she had done. It was not going to be that easy. It was going to take time.

They say time heals everything. In that case she wondered why it had not healed the battle wounds Arizona constantly threw in Callie's face.

All that went through her head was how did we get here. Where did I go wrong. I saved her, Callie says as she holds a family picture in her hands.

Where do I go. I have no one.

As she began to watch the sun shine into their apartment, a beam of light hit the corner of a silver frame. A frame that held the first picture of Mark and baby Sofia the day she was brought home from the hospital.

She was not alone.

With the day off, Callie quickly grabbed her jacket, and keys as she began her way to the destination she should have been all along.

Arizona Robbins was not perfect. Although she was the ideal catch with bright blue eyes, blonde hair and an enormous heart, she still had her faults. To get straight to the point to she was human.

Mistakes are made. We are forced to face battles because they make us stronger. We build and grow. We learn from mistakes to become better people.

Arizona was a good man in a storm. Yes, she had done the unthinkable by cheating on her wife after everything they had been through.

She wanted Callie to understand her pain. She constant struggle. She just couldn't find the words. The exact words to explain the mental pain she dealt with everyday of her life.

Arizona had just finished up an all night shift at the hospital involving a multiple organ surgery that resulted in the death of six year old child.

She was tired. She was lost. She was broken.

It had been routine for the couple to memorize each others surgery schedules for the week. She knew Callie would have had wine waiting on the counter to help ease the pain of the loss of one of her tiny humans.

Instead Arizona walked into an empty dark apartment. An apartment that was once filled with such joy. It was an apartment that held the pieces of two broken people trying to make it from day to day.

Arizona dropped her bags and sat on the couch. She looked at all the pictures hanging throughout their home.

After changing her clothes she grabbed her things and decided to go to a destination that would help clear her thoughts.

Callie had finally made her way to Seattle Memorial Cemetery. It only took an hour or two longer than expected thanks to Sofia not wanting to wear anything besides her halloween costume.

She threw her keys in her bag as she grabbed the flowers to place on Mark and Lexie's grave. It seemed like it was only yesterday that hundreds of doctors gathered at this very cemetery to pay their respects to these two doctors who had died so young.

Callie began to walk downward on the path that lead to the tombstones. She was taken back when she noticed someone had already placed flowers at the very spot of the two graves.

Then she stopped walking. She stopped thinking. She even stopped breathing as she saw a blonde head of hair bobbing back and fourth in front of the graves.

It was Arizona.

She had one hand resting on her cane as she placed the other flower on Mark's headstone.

Callie slowly began to walk behind where her distraught wife was standing.

"You know, as much as I hate to admit it Mark, I wish you were here to help. I know you would know exactly what to say to help her. To help her feel better. I know she won't listen to me. I don't expect her to after what I've done." Arizona says as she wipes away the fresh of tears that have formed on her cheeks.

"I don't know what to say yet alone do Mark. I have done the thing I hated both you and her for. I would never purposely do this to her. I love...I love her more than anything in this entire world. I just don't know how to fix this."

Finally Callie finds enough courage to walk further, now standing directly next to Arizona's right side. The side she is heavily leaning on her cane with support so she won't tumble.

"Oh my...Callie!? How...how long were you just standing there..." Arizona says in startled voice as she shifts her weight to her left.

"Long enough to hear what you just said. How did you even get here Arizona?" Callie says as she places the flowers on the graves below.

"I was at home and you and Sofia weren't there. I needed somewhere to go. So I called a cab. It's peaceful here. It's like its just us and them. None of the rest of the things in the world seem to matter." Arizona says as she turns to look at Callie.

"Your leg hurts doesn't it." Callie responds as she tries to ignore the heartwarming sentence that her wife had just said.

"Yeah. I had a seven hour surgery. Seven hours of standing and she still didn't pull through." Arizona says as she drops her head down.

"I know, I heard. I was going to bring some wine home after I came here." Callie says as she begins to grab her keys from her bag.

"Sometimes I just come here and sit. This is the actual first time I've been able to get any words out. Any words that actually make sense. Usually they are just tears combined with mumbles of my thoughts." Arizona begins to say stopping to take a large breathe.

"But I really messed up this time and no matter what words I say won't fix my actions this time. I really really messed up Callie." Arizona admits as she begins to cry harder and harder.

Callie froze. She was so use to grabbing Arizona and pulling her into a tight embrace the second she saw tears forming in her eyes.

Now they were both so shattered. They were practically enemies playing for the same team.

They were still a team though. No matter how bruised and battered they were, they were standing in front of the grave of two people who loved each other so much but never got the chance to spend their lives together. Two people who had practically loved each other from a distance. A distance that was finally broken when it was too late.

Callie closed her eyes and grabbed the cane from Arizona's right hand.

"Call...what..what are you doing, I need that." Arizona says in a quiet but stern voice as she already begins to lose her balance on the dirt gravel below.

"Just be quiet Arizona." Callie snaps as she puts the cane in her own right hand and grabs onto Arizona's hand.

Arizona began to cry harder, finally able to let it out. Finally able to break into the tiny little pieces that were being held together by tape.

The two broken yet amazingly brave doctors stood there for another ten minutes holding hands.

After the storm passes you have two options. You can completely move on from everything you had once loved. You can just start over. Start fresh with nothing to go off from.

You can also rebuild. It is what surgeons build. They take what is broken and make it stronger. They take the unthinkable and make it better than it once was.

Callie was a bone breaker married to the surgeon who fixed the tiny humans. She could break them both apart so easily. She could put them back together where the bones belong so much easier though.

Like bones, joints and ligaments people sometimes are fractured. They pull apart. They pull against each other. But just as much as they might try to go separate ways, things are just meant to stay together.


End file.
